Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He wakes up too early. His alarm goes off and he wakes from a dream of Scottish Independence and dancing a jig but then he realises his alarm went off too early and he doesn’t know why he is dancing a jig because he can’t vote and he doesn’t know how he would vote because he keeps changing his mind but it looks like someone is going to win. Somewhere an otter eats a fish. Somewhere…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He wakes up too early. His alarm goes off and he wakes from a dream of Scottish Independence and dancing a jig but then he realises his alarm went off too early and he doesn’t know why he is dancing a jig because he can’t vote and he doesn’t know how he would vote because he keeps changing his mind but it looks like someone is going to win. Somewhere an otter eats a fish. Somewhere else a deer looks off into the distance as it hears a noise. John Kerry is talking to Congress again. The ladies in Pink are standing behind him again. There are signs. Bored looking members of Congress ask questions. They all look like they want to be playing golf with fundraisers at their high walled golf clubs. He watches a trailer for Fury. He wonders at the constant refrain of the brave little Americans fighting the gargantuan enemy when the truth is that America is gargantuan and the enemy of America is always little. There is no terror in that or profit in that or shame in that. There is shame in that. Shame is everywhere. He reads Waiting for Godot. GODot. godOT. A magician wins America’s Got Talent. Will he magic away the financial crises, the military crises, the crisis crises? He will not but he does seem to be good with his hands and he has a sincere to the point of mania Tom Cruise smile. He draws, he plots, he schemes. He sleeps.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. There is coffee. He is talking with an old lady about her manipulative grandchildren who know all the codes who have thousands of dollars in their bank accounts whose ages change from 8 to 10 to 19 to 18 depending on when he asks questions about them. He dreams about prostitutes who have all become fashion consultants. There is no more to the dream than that. He watches an interview…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. There is coffee. He is talking with an old lady about her manipulative grandchildren who know all the codes who have thousands of dollars in their bank accounts whose ages change from 8 to 10 to 19 to 18 depending on when he asks questions about them. He dreams about prostitutes who have all become fashion consultants. There is no more to the dream than that. He watches an interview…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. There is coffee. He is talking with an old lady about her manipulative grandchildren who know all the codes who have thousands of dollars in their bank accounts whose ages change from 8 to 10 to 19 to 18 depending on when he asks questions about them. He dreams about prostitutes who have all become fashion consultants. There is no more to the dream than that. He watches an interview with Eddy Conway ex of the Black Panthers. He watches a course on learning well. He procrastinates. He learns nothing from the course. He eats half a burger. He trims his prodigious beard. He cannot understand America without understanding race. He cannot understand the world without understanding race. He dreams about people who do not have eyes but have paintbrush bristles where there eyes should be an  no other features but that their faces smooth polished variegated wood their bodies entirely ordinary just their faces wooden and flat and their eyes tight paintbrush bristles they seem entirely okay with this state of affairs. There is no war just dropping bombs there is no war just talk of boots on the ground there is no conflict or war just targeted killings and advisors and regurgitated humanity spoiling in a heap. There is no war but there will be boots on the ground but there won’t be boots on the ground this is not a war this is not a war this is not a war. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He hears that there has been another decapitation. This time is is a British man. Next time there will be another British man. Then there will be more lined up heads rolling down the hill and soon decapitations will not make headlines because there will be so many of them. Then he makes some brownies. Then he eats some sushi. Then he walks. Then he lies down. There is rain outside.…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He hears that there has been another decapitation. This time is is a British man. Next time there will be another British man. Then there will be more lined up heads rolling down the hill and soon decapitations will not make headlines because there will be so many of them. Then he makes some brownies. Then he eats some sushi. Then he walks. Then he lies down. There is rain outside.…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He hears that there has been another decapitation. This time is is a British man. Next time there will be another British man. Then there will be more lined up heads rolling down the hill and soon decapitations will not make headlines because there will be so many of them. Then he makes some brownies. Then he eats some sushi. Then he walks. Then he lies down. There is rain outside. It is coming down from the sky. There are clouds full of rain. There are clouds full of tears. Never trust a clown. He eats a tasty burger. He creates a fictional home in a digital town by the sea and spends too much time making the living room look just perfect when he doesn’t own a house in real life. He eats some lemon crunch pie. His digital avatar eats some lemon crunch pie. There is something terrible and sad about this. He forgets what happened during the rest of the day. His mind is a creamy white amnesiac cloud. He goes to sleep hoping that he will remember what he has forgotten and forget what he keeps remembering.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. President Obama has gone Liam Neeson on IS or ISIL or ISIS or whatever the gang of desert ne’er do wells are called. He is not sure that President Obama believes anything he says publicly anymore but he’s saying it he saying it again and again. He watches as the fear of ISIS grows and grows and grows and the news stories talk about the growing fears even as the CIA says again and…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. President Obama has gone Liam Neeson on IS or ISIL or ISIS or whatever the gang of desert ne’er do wells are called. He is not sure that President Obama believes anything he says publicly anymore but he’s saying it he saying it again and again. He watches as the fear of ISIS grows and grows and grows and the news stories talk about the growing fears even as the CIA says again and…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. President Obama has gone Liam Neeson on IS or ISIL or ISIS or whatever the gang of desert ne’er do wells are called. He is not sure that President Obama believes anything he says publicly anymore but he’s saying it he saying it again and again. He watches as the fear of ISIS grows and grows and grows and the news stories talk about the growing fears even as the CIA says again and again that there are no credible threats and when the CIA say there are no credible threats there are probably no credible threats because the CIA love having credible threats to get their black ops money for and are always willing to talk about threats so even if they don’t think that they are a threat then are they a threat. He does not know. Then he gets angry because Cecily Strong is being kicked off Weekend Update because no one wants to kick the White coiffed head writer off Weekend Update because the white man always wins even though her replacement is the excellent Michael Che but why not have Michael Che and Cecily Strong is it because Lorne Michaels thinks that America is not ready for a black man and a white woman to appear together on live television doing comedy together week in and week out is america still terrified of a black man and a white woman making comedy together is this where we are have we not moved on he thinks to himself. Then he plans his lunch. Then he goes to the gym. Then he showers. Then he wonders if Ted Cruz’s strange argument that Lorne Michaels could be in prison for satire if a law limiting Citizens United comes into affect is a real argument or if Senator Ted Cruz is actually an apolitical performance artist who managed to get elected with grant money from a billionaires art foundation. It is a hot muggy night. He sits in Wholefoods and joins the other hairy homeless men in the pot plants and the dirty tables. He holds hands. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. Trembling muscles dripping off bone. He farts what feels like his body volume in gas. His alarm goes of too early. He is fat. He is fatter than he has ever been. The bus is on time. He gets on the bus. Two people in front of him fiddle with money and change and it annoys him that they knew that they did not have passes but did not think that it was required of them to wait until all…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. Trembling muscles dripping off bone. He farts what feels like his body volume in gas. His alarm goes of too early. He is fat. He is fatter than he has ever been. The bus is on time. He gets on the bus. Two people in front of him fiddle with money and change and it annoys him that they knew that they did not have passes but did not think that it was required of them to wait until all…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. Trembling muscles dripping off bone. He farts what feels like his body volume in gas. His alarm goes of too early. He is fat. He is fatter than he has ever been. The bus is on time. He gets on the bus. Two people in front of him fiddle with money and change and it annoys him that they knew that they did not have passes but did not think that it was required of them to wait until all those who had passes to get on the bus first so that they could get seats like him so he could get a seat he finally gets a seat. He keeps his anger inside. He buys some granola bars. He buys a sandwich. He does not by a Jimmy Dean Breakfast Biscuit. He marks this as a rare triumph in a day which will not have many victories. He gets sucked back into Facebook. He drinks too much coffee. He eats a sandwich. He buys some smoothies and puts them in the fridge. He eats lentils which taste like glorious meat and roasted cauliflower which tastes like magic. Stephen Colbert will gurn around with Henry Kissinger tonight and his heart will die a little and he will lose a little more respect for Stephen Colbert. It is the day of the towers falling it is the day of a country backed turned over to a dictator who manipulated and destroyed his people with the Chicago Boys and Kissinger looming and death squads and disappearances and the chimneys spewing people and death and sadness and the clouds formed and burrowed and the igition of the 21st century the pilot light that sparked the fire the engulfed the world that killed an Empire that doesn’t know it’s dead yet as a far older and larger beast slowly turns and wakes and watches. Then he tumbles down a hill tumbling tumbling tumbling and Oscar Pistorius is not guilty of murder but who knows what will happen tomorrow and there is 911 and 911 and 911 and each 911 has a different meaning and significance but they are all important and Jaws is dead and he goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He watches Brian Williams rubs shafts with Matt Lauer. They spar. They spar verbally. There is tension and shark smiling. He wonders if Isis is just the ASL ice bucket challenge gone horribly wrong. Nominations for Saladin, Ishmael and Frank-n-Furter. George W Bush and Bill Clinton are now best friends. He is sick in his mouth. Power accretes power. An NFP football player is…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He watches Brian Williams rubs shafts with Matt Lauer. They spar. They spar verbally. There is tension and shark smiling. He wonders if Isis is just the ASL ice bucket challenge gone horribly wrong. Nominations for Saladin, Ishmael and Frank-n-Furter. George W Bush and Bill Clinton are now best friends. He is sick in his mouth. Power accretes power. An NFP football player is…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He watches Brian Williams rubs shafts with Matt Lauer. They spar. They spar verbally. There is tension and shark smiling. He wonders if Isis is just the ASL ice bucket challenge gone horribly wrong. Nominations for Saladin, Ishmael and Frank-n-Furter. George W Bush and Bill Clinton are now best friends. He is sick in his mouth. Power accretes power. An NFP football player is suspended when a video appears of him punching his fiancee. Even though they knew he did it he only got two game suspension because they hadn’t seen it. A reflection of what is important. Money, profit, optics. The optics are wrong. No matter the ethics no matter the morality. At least Mel Brooks is still alive. They didn’t see it. So it doesn’t exist. He didn’t see the moon landings so they can’t be real. He didn’t see his own birth so he didn’t believe it. He didn’t see the bus arrive so he doesn’t believe that it got here. He didn’t see the formation of the continents so he does not believe that they exist. He cannot see oxygen so he is not sure that he is breathing it. He has never seen the earth from space so he doesn’t believe the world is a sphere zipping through space. He watches food commercials he watches car commercials. All using fear and doubt. Be afraid America. Be afraid. Stop thinking America don’t worry that your heroes are weak tired hypocrits. Liars and cheaters and brutish billionaires. Better than Hippo Crits. River creatures reviewing popular culture. Maybe not better than Hippo Crits. He watches Simon Critchley and Cornell West talking. They are talking about religion and violence. He listens to John Pilger. He listens to Noam Chomsky. It is one of those kinds of days. Richard Branson is an odd looking man. Sometimes it’s okay to give up your dreams. You won’t die. The Queen of the United kingdom is worried about Scotland. The economist Paul Krugman is worried about Scotland. This maybe the only time they will be worried about the same thing. He thinks more about an idea he has. He thinks that it is a good idea and the he thinks it’s a bad idea. He is undecided. Angry atheists make him sad. Happy Christians make him cringe. He listens to Cspan. It is both uplifting and depressing. Imaginary People think Obama is a Child Eating Muslim Jewish Atheist Christian Kenyan Communist Socialist. These people have access to the same information as everyone else and also the right to vote. The anniversary of 911 is approaching. The day that Pinochet stole Chile and also the day that planes hit the twin towers in New York and today is Zeinab Badawi interogating John Mccain by the lake that Amidala and Anakin Skywalker fell in love. Today is Scotland divorcing itself from Britain as Britain first acts like a violent lover bullying Scotland to stay with threats and violence and then begging Scotland to stay with gifts and bouquets of power it all looks very embarassing and no one has really planned for the split. Then he eats some rice it is a lot of rice and it has vegetables with it and also tomato sauce and he finds a bag of almonds and he books a flight to London and London terrifies him already he hears the pulsing wet beat of it’s corrupt blackened heart in his ears as he feels himself being sucked back into the pit the comforting embrace of the oily pit. Then he plays Tiny Death Star. It is an awful game that has no other point than to teach children that the most soulless parts of capitalism are compelling and entertaining taught through the lens of the Star Wars universe. He is hopelessly addicted to it and then he watches America’s Got Talent and the sound disappears for the last act so only atmospheric cheering can be heard. It is like watching television in a dream and then he cuddles and then he goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. When he went to sleep there was no caliphate. There no chance that there was going to be an independent Scotland. There was no new royal baby in Britain ready to carry on the democratic bloodline of the German Royal Family. He wakes up unaware of all of these things. The plane that crashed in the ocean is still missing and Robin Williams is dead and Joan Rivers is dead and lots of…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. When he went to sleep there was no caliphate. There no chance that there was going to be an independent Scotland. There was no new royal baby in Britain ready to carry on the democratic bloodline of the German Royal Family. He wakes up unaware of all of these things. The plane that crashed in the ocean is still missing and Robin Williams is dead and Joan Rivers is dead and lots of…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. When he went to sleep there was no caliphate. There no chance that there was going to be an independent Scotland. There was no new royal baby in Britain ready to carry on the democratic bloodline of the German Royal Family. He wakes up unaware of all of these things. The plane that crashed in the ocean is still missing and Robin Williams is dead and Joan Rivers is dead and lots of other people are dead but they aren’t famous. He wonders if waking up is ever worth it. He decides it is but he goes back to sleep anyway.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. The world is not going well. There is lots of violence. Someone stands up for gentrification without thinking about what that might mean why it might be better to help those communities with their problems rather than price them out of their homes and their lives so that rich white people can enjoy atmosphere ambience authenticity at jacked up prices the prison is being crushed…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. The world is not going well. There is lots of violence. Someone stands up for gentrification without thinking about what that might mean why it might be better to help those communities with their problems rather than price them out of their homes and their lives so that rich white people can enjoy atmosphere ambience authenticity at jacked up prices the prison is being crushed…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. The world is not going well. There is lots of violence. Someone stands up for gentrification without thinking about what that might mean why it might be better to help those communities with their problems rather than price them out of their homes and their lives so that rich white people can enjoy atmosphere ambience authenticity at jacked up prices the prison is being crushed schools crushed the slow creeping inevitability of colonisation colonization soon they will all be gone and dust and forgotten and a sad story in the endnote of a book that no one reads in a library that is on fire. Then he plays Tiny Death Star which is very cute but bespeaks the joys of a totalitarian capitalocracy underpinned with violence and surveillance. It’s insidious message is not missed by him but he just can’t stop playing it. Elsewhere a city crumbles. Somewhere else talking heads bob and weave and duck and dive. In yet still other places someone is masturbating to a picture they found in a puddle. There is excrement everywhere. Someone is wearing a pair of wellington boots. Other people don’t know what wellington boots are. Someone stubs their toe. Someone else is decapitated. He reads Bossypants by Tina Fey. It is hilarious. He reads it out loud and laughs aloud. He rants about an app that encourages mariginalisation of people of color. He rants about a white supremacist technocracy. He has a nap. He rants about those who can’t see the problems with gentrification. He rants. He rents. He runts. He grunts. He tires and eats a pizza and has a glass of elderflower cider. It is tasty. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He smells like a homeless person. What has he missed? Has anything important happened? He doesn’t remember where he was. Perhaps in a wooded glade. A desert. On a train bound for glory. He shrugs his shoulders and thinks about showering. He goes to look for a shower. He finds somewhere to lie down. He goes to sleep.

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He smells like a homeless person. What has he missed? Has anything important happened? He doesn’t remember where he was. Perhaps in a wooded glade. A desert. On a train bound for glory. He shrugs his shoulders and thinks about showering. He goes to look for a shower. He finds somewhere to lie down. He goes to sleep.

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He smells like a homeless person. What has he missed? Has anything important happened? He doesn’t remember where he was. Perhaps in a wooded glade. A desert. On a train bound for glory. He shrugs his shoulders and thinks about showering. He goes to look for a shower. He finds somewhere to lie down. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. A journalist rummaged through the luggage of dead people. It disgusts people even though it is what journalists do every day. A tacit agreement we have with them that we get to read what they write about tragedy as long as wet don’t have to be complicit in how they discover that tragedy. It was to much for us. We do not want to see how the sausage is made. The Senate votes to support…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. A journalist rummaged through the luggage of dead people. It disgusts people even though it is what journalists do every day. A tacit agreement we have with them that we get to read what they write about tragedy as long as wet don’t have to be complicit in how they discover that tragedy. It was to much for us. We do not want to see how the sausage is made. The Senate votes to support…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. A journalist rummaged through the luggage of dead people. It disgusts people even though it is what journalists do every day. A tacit agreement we have with them that we get to read what they write about tragedy as long as we don’t have to be complicit in how they discover that tragedy. It was too much for us. We do not want to see how the sausage is made. The Senate votes to support bombardment of Gaza. Even the progressive heroes of the left. Children shields? No one cares. An excuse to flex anti-Semitic muscles on one hand an excuse to shake heads at the horror of civilian death on the other. Then there are all the other hands begging reaching grasping. This is what nation states do to perceived enemies. They expunge they delete they bleach it is wrong it has been done before it will be done again the lodz ghetto is now the Gaza refugee camp will be the Detroit forbidden zone will be the Birmingham prison city. Grind your families into paste we will all be Soylent Green one day. The clown of international law raises its buffoonish head above the parapet and is exploded by a sniper’s bullet but it’s okay folks that was just a balloon full of ketchup with a clown face drawn on it international law is safe and sound in an undisclosed bunker ready to be used by those with the most power as and when it suits them. He drinks a chai. He is in a library surrounded by books. It is pleasant. He reads that 66% of Americans now live in places that are not covered by the constitution which seems like a lot of Americans. Everyone is not the slug on the razor blade but more and more are joining it slowly slicing itself as it inches forward slowly splitting in two. He writes. He travels on public transport. He eats a tasty black bean burger. He shuts off from news. Objective news is shut off. He travels into another world. A place of giants and vikings. The end of the world. All the gods are dead. It is melancholy. Tribes wandering in the icy wastes the dry deserts the lush jungles. All lost. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up from not sleeping. He switches on al jazeera. He reads debt by David graeber. He reads more Proust. He reads the Federalist papers. He reads the anti federalist papers. He reads the fiery brook. He finishes a chapter of his novel. Thisis surprising. He eats soup. He drinks coffee. He watches tutorial videos for AutoCAD 3d studio. He has a shower. There is no milk for cereal. He is the…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up from not sleeping. He switches on al jazeera. He reads debt by David graeber. He reads more Proust. He reads the Federalist papers. He reads the anti federalist papers. He reads the fiery brook. He finishes a chapter of his novel. Thisis surprising. He eats soup. He drinks coffee. He watches tutorial videos for AutoCAD 3d studio. He has a shower. There is no milk for cereal. He is the…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up from not sleeping. He switches on al jazeera. He reads debt by David graeber. He reads more Proust. He reads the Federalist papers. He reads the anti federalist papers. He reads the fiery brook. He finishes a chapter of his novel. Thisis surprising. He eats soup. He drinks coffee. He watches tutorial videos for AutoCAD 3d studio. He has a shower. There is no milk for cereal. He is the only person, except for the driver, on the bus. He wonders if he can put a campaign on kickstarter for him to jump a shark. Perhaps funding the potato salad is the internet funding equivalent of jumping the shark so his point has already been made. Zach Braff gets more space than Nadine Gordimer in the newspaper that he finds on the bus. He finds this ridiculous but then he acknowledges that he is more familiar with the work of Zach Braff than the work of Nadine Gordimer. The Germans celebrate their world cup win. David hasslehof is nowhere to be seen. Perhaps they are saving him for the big finale. They are not saving him for the big finale. The German team appears to start the YMCA dance then it devolves into something less choreographed but no less sincere. Someone talks about an awning idea kit on the television. How many ideas can there be in an awning idea kit. Use as awning. Wrap evidence in and bury in the woods at night. Wipe up blood in. Cower under. use as awning. You get it free when you buy an awning. It doesn’t seem like anyone could reasonably charge for an awning idea kit. Many hoops are jumped through contortions are made to justify the massacre of human beings. Children dying on the beach human shields for sand for boats for fishermen. He sees the future and it falls away into the darkness of the void the edge of the cliff crumbling like dry bread under his feet. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. There is no news. There is news but he doesn’t read it so he pretends there is no news. He drinks a coffee. He writes words. He praises. He questions. He tries to reason and he eats some soup. He looks at the storm outside and is happy that he is inside protected by the house that he is inside. He goes to sleep.

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. There is no news. There is news but he doesn’t read it so he pretends there is no news. He drinks a coffee. He writes words. He praises. He questions. He tries to reason and he eats some soup. He looks at the storm outside and is happy that he is inside protected by the house that he is inside. He goes to sleep.

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. There is no news. There is news but he doesn’t read it so he pretends there is no news. He drinks a coffee. He writes words. He praises. He questions. He tries to reason and he eats some soup. He looks at the storm outside and is happy that he is inside protected by the house that he is inside. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day

He wakes up. He falls. He gets up. He dawdles. He watches a Comcast commercial that tries to hide the fact that is against net neutrality. It will probably succeed. He eats an empanada. It is a good empanada. He feels tremendous twisting sadness. He archives important art. He feels old. He reads about art. He worries about his mental health. He is invited to an artists’ retreat. He cannot go but…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day

He wakes up. He falls. He gets up. He dawdles. He watches a Comcast commercial that tries to hide the fact that is against net neutrality. It will probably succeed. He eats an empanada. It is a good empanada. He feels tremendous twisting sadness. He archives important art. He feels old. He reads about art. He worries about his mental health. He is invited to an artists’ retreat. He cannot go but…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day


He wakes up. He falls. He gets up. He dawdles. He watches a Comcast commercial that tries to hide the fact that is against net neutrality. It will probably succeed. He eats an empanada. It is a good empanada. He feels tremendous twisting sadness. He archives important art. He feels old. He reads about art. He worries about his mental health. He is invited to an artists’ retreat. He cannot go but he is excited to be invited. He eats Brown rice. He talks with friends even as he feels the distance growing between them. He finishes things and then he goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. It is early. Savannah Guthrie is pregnant. She should host Meet the Press. He has a coffee and some cereal. He talks to a friend. They share righteous anger about the world. He sees an empty cigar case by the bus stop and thinks simultaneously of the cigar he often smokes with a brandy or a whiskey or some other unremembered liquor on New Years Eve and bill Clinton and Monica…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. It is early. Savannah Guthrie is pregnant. She should host Meet the Press. He has a coffee and some cereal. He talks to a friend. They share righteous anger about the world. He sees an empty cigar case by the bus stop and thinks simultaneously of the cigar he often smokes with a brandy or a whiskey or some other unremembered liquor on New Years Eve and bill Clinton and Monica…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. It is early. Savannah Guthrie is pregnant. She should host Meet the Press. He has a coffee and some cereal. He talks to a friend. They share righteous anger about the world. He sees an empty cigar case by the bus stop and thinks simultaneously of the cigar he often smokes with a brandy or a whiskey or some other unremembered liquor on New Years Eve and bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky in the oval office and how that charming lecherous man ruined many parts of that young woman’s life and yet still she appears strong and funny and wise because terrible things happen but even through them life is never wholly ruined just reshaped and tattered round it’s once pristine edges. A man leaves an envelope on the bus. He may have just got out of jail and the letter may be important. He calls after the man and gives him his letter. The man says thank you as he leaves the bus. It is a good feeling to be thanked by a stranger for a small kindness. He sits on the train and sees and old man with a wrist brace. He gets into an elevator with a man who is wearing moccasins threequarter length shorts and a fedora. He judges him and finds him wanting whilst also being envious of his confidence to be sartorially ridiculous. He had that once but now he has lost that. He goes to the baseball. It is hot. It is humid. Seats are sat in. Then it starts to rain and so begins the second level of hell. Food is purchased and then the shambling damned are watched with pity as they walk round and round in circles forever and no decision is made but that these people will continue to buy food and drink and ponchos and increase the profit of the stadium for another day because the rain keeps on coming down and forever passes by and a gap appears in the mass and it is entered but then it swallows them and they are trapped no with the damned shuffling forever wishing they had never left their comfortable spot by the pillar but now they are part of the behemoth limbed ocean of humanity that sludges by weeping and gnashing without food without water without beer without poncho and still the rain falls and still no decision is made and then the decide themselves and assert their ability to choose and spear their way out of the crowd and escape and barrel towards the exit thrusting creatures aside and carving them asunder as they finally escape into the balm of the rain and yet they find themselves abandoned by transport and still hopeless and lost and then a shining beacon of hope arrives on a chariot and they get in the chariot and go home and sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. The elevator sounds like a penny whistle. It penny whistles down. He reads more Octavia Butler. He thinks about teeth. He thinks about whales. He thinks about royal families. He thinks about accidentally downloading a film from a dubious source and then getting a worried email from his landlord about a letter that he received from Verizon concerning illegal downloading. He is going…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. The elevator sounds like a penny whistle. It penny whistles down. He reads more Octavia Butler. He thinks about teeth. He thinks about whales. He thinks about royal families. He thinks about accidentally downloading a film from a dubious source and then getting a worried email from his landlord about a letter that he received from Verizon concerning illegal downloading. He is going…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. The elevator sounds like a penny whistle. It penny whistles down. He reads more Octavia Butler. He thinks about teeth. He thinks about whales. He thinks about royal families. He thinks about accidentally downloading a film from a dubious source and then getting a worried email from his landlord about a letter that he received from Verizon concerning illegal downloading. He is going to be sent to federal prison for watching Divergent illegally. He is scared. The air conditioning does not work. He is sweating motionless on the bed beads of sweat writing on his body weighing his body down. He has a coffee. He has an an erection. He has a thought. He takes food for lunch. He looks forward to pulled pork empanadas. He doesn’t have to wait long for the bus. He arrived at work. His mug has gone his Orioles mug has gone some muggerfucker has stolen it he is irritated and he searches prowls the desks for his treasured Orioles mug but he cannot find it he cannot find his mug anywhere no matter how hard he searches he returns to his grotto defeated. He is remembering things in the wrong order. He imagined Proust never had this problem. He eats lunch. He works. He works quite hard. It is not hard work. He smiles at the Scotland uniform for the commonwealth games. It looks like a drunk rainbow has vomited on the team. It is amazing. He can’t look away. He is mesmerized. He goes to the gym. His muscles ache in a pleasant way. Afterwards he positions himself under a light in the changing room and tenses his muscles. The angle of the light casts sharp relief on his body and he looks very toned. He is not very toned and he knows this but he enjoys the fantasy as he stands under the light tensing into the mirror then he hears the door to the changing room open so he quickly grabs a towel and rushes into the shower he does not want to be found nude by a colleague creating poses in a changing room mirror even under complimentary lighting. It is hot and humid outside. He is not late for the train. He times the train perfectly. He is on the train. He is aiming directly for his bed. He will eat his carrot spinach kale soup which is far tastier than it has any right to be. It has every right to be tasty. He stops arguing with his taste buds and just lets the pleasure wash over him. He reads. He writes. He cogitates. He drinks coffee. He watches msnbc. He watches fox news. He watches cnn. He ignores the throbbing at the back of the head that watching these three things does. Then he cannot ignore it so he turns the television off. He reads about the death of the novel the death of the literary novel and the phoenix rising of the self-published fan fiction extravaganza. He thinks about getting a haircut. He needs to get a haircut. His hair is too long. He ponders over a conversation he overheard at work. He self-flagellates about an error at work that could have been solved, by him, days ago, but he let it go and then it got out of control. Then he gets over it because no one died. Then he watches a trailer for Dawn of the Apes. Hollywood does love Apocalypse. Hollywood does have contempt for the masses for the people venerating the strong leader the benevolent fascist the Strong Man the cowardly huddle mass begging for leadership and direction. Not a democratic view of the world. He does not know what that means or what to make of it. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He follows an old man who leans on a cane. The old man is wearing a tshirt. Written On the back of the Tshirt is ‘Still porkin’ after all these years.’ The inclusion of the apostrophe gives a jaunty feel to an old man publicly declaring that he still fucks regularly. The man has white hair and a beard like summertime Father Christmas. The supreme court respects the religious rights…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He follows an old man who leans on a cane. The old man is wearing a tshirt. Written On the back of the Tshirt is ‘Still porkin’ after all these years.’ The inclusion of the apostrophe gives a jaunty feel to an old man publicly declaring that he still fucks regularly. The man has white hair and a beard like summertime Father Christmas. The supreme court respects the religious rights…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He follows an old man who leans on a cane. The old man is wearing a tshirt. Written On the back of the Tshirt is ‘Still porkin’ after all these years.’ The inclusion of the apostrophe gives a jaunty feel to an old man publicly declaring that he still fucks regularly. The man has white hair and a beard like summertime Father Christmas. The supreme court respects the religious rights of incorporeal persons over the rights of corporeal persons. The Juggernaut to corporate theocracy continues happily onward. He wonders if religio-conservative America would be okay with a Muslim family running a successful company and then applying moderate sharia law to their employees. He thinks religio-conservative America might not like that not one bit at all. He eats some dates. He eats some almonds. He waits for the bus. A very old small lady walks very slowly into the bus. The old lady pays with a lot of change each coin coming into the coin collector as the great from outside gold the bus the site conditioning pushing against the wall of heat so hot already in the hot humid morning. A man has eyes everywhere. A woman did on her electric chair observing the passengers enter. A man reads a broad sheet he purchased from a vending machine. This is a rare occurrence it is not an app or a website or a free bus newspaper handed out by at a loss by friendly people at bus stops. He watches the USA get defeated by Belgium in the world cup and then marvels that America manages to call it a victory which it cannot be if the definition of victory is being used in an accurate way. Someone says that the underdog US team comes back the top dog but this is to misunderstand what top dog means. The US team was defeated and they lost and that is okay the taste of failure is not a pleasant one but it is a common one and he thinks it is sad that it has got to the point where a media psychosis exists that does not allow for the acknowledgment of American defeat. As with soccer so with armed conflict and hegemony. Nothing can be learned from the denial of defeat. It only covers the festering injury with another bloody bandage when what is really needed is a painful cleaning and redressing of the wound so that healing can be completed. He ponders this as he watches America’s Got Talent and observes more honesty in that show than in Congress and that to makes him pause and think but he reaches no firm conclusions other than they are probably all on the same continuum and the sliding scale of perception will art some point squeeze them all together. He goes to sleep. .

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He was asleep. Now is he awake. His brittle bones are softening after bikram yoga. His aching body is aching in a good way. He eats a salad. He presses some buttons. He watches a woman eat a hundred dollar ice cream. He is tempted by a burrito he finds on a bus. It has only been bitten once. It would be free supper. Earlier in the day he eats a sandwich and has a coffee. He thinks…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He was asleep. Now is he awake. His brittle bones are softening after bikram yoga. His aching body is aching in a good way. He eats a salad. He presses some buttons. He watches a woman eat a hundred dollar ice cream. He is tempted by a burrito he finds on a bus. It has only been bitten once. It would be free supper. Earlier in the day he eats a sandwich and has a coffee. He thinks…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He was asleep. Now is he awake. His brittle bones are softening after bikram yoga. His aching body is aching in a good way. He eats a salad. He presses some buttons. He watches a woman eat a hundred dollar ice cream. He is tempted by a burrito he finds on a bus. It has only been bitten once. It would be free supper. Earlier in the day he eats a sandwich and has a coffee. He thinks about making some soup but he doesn’t make any soup. The Caliphate seems to be spreading over Iraq and Syria. Everyone is learning about the Sykes-Picot Agreement. He learns more about the pirate origins of the British Empire – all open out in the history books that nobody reads. The President of America makes a joke about crack. His wife is not impressed. He presses some more buttons. He takes some photographs. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He was up until 2 in the morning looking for silver to dig up with his copper pickaxe. He found iron and copper and gold but no silver no silver anywhere. He was attacked by creatures. Then he hid in a cave barely protected from the acid rain. So now he is slumped at his desk at work not hiding from acid rain but hiding from work. He takes photographs of soccer fans. They look just…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He was up until 2 in the morning looking for silver to dig up with his copper pickaxe. He found iron and copper and gold but no silver no silver anywhere. He was attacked by creatures. Then he hid in a cave barely protected from the acid rain. So now he is slumped at his desk at work not hiding from acid rain but hiding from work. He takes photographs of soccer fans. They look just…

View On WordPress

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He was up until 2 in the morning looking for silver to dig up with his copper pickaxe. He found iron and copper and gold but no silver no silver anywhere. He was attacked by creatures. Then he hid in a cave barely protected from the acid rain. He is 37 years old. He should not be doing this. So now he is slumped at his desk at work not hiding from acid rain but hiding from work. He takes photographs of soccer fans. They look just like football fans but they are all American and there are some Germans too. Then he eats some spinach. Then he saves himself for a tasty burger and a date which was worth the rumbling belly and the fluttering heart and then he goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up the muzzy taste of beer in his mouth. It was only a quarter of a small bottle a tiny bottle. He farts he showers he farts he makes a coffee eats shredded crispy cereal. He waits for two buses that never arrive but a third arrives that he wasn’t expecting. He gets on that bus. He spend the day pressing things and then put in his place by a superior for no other reason than to remind…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up the muzzy taste of beer in his mouth. It was only a quarter of a small bottle a tiny bottle. He farts he showers he farts he makes a coffee eats shredded crispy cereal. He waits for two buses that never arrive but a third arrives that he wasn’t expecting. He gets on that bus. He spend the day pressing things and then put in his place by a superior for no other reason than to remind…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up the muzzy taste of beer in his mouth. It was only a quarter of a small bottle a tiny bottle. He farts he showers he farts he makes a coffee eats shredded crispy cereal. He waits for two buses that never arrive but a third arrives that he wasn’t expecting. He gets on that bus. He spend the day pressing things and then put in his place by a superior for no other reason than to remind him where power lies that he is powerless how it is exercised how easily he can be excised from the body employable. A mote floating in giant ghost cloud of everything. He sits on a train. Everyone looks sad. Everyone looks sad and tired. Everyone looks tired. Gravity is pulling down every single expression. A child adding questions to the air is the only sign of life the only sign of hope. It is enough to keep the wheel turning. He presses a lot more buttons. He is not doing his job very well but he is doing it well enough. There are no complaints so he breathes easy for at least one more day. He is not a ninja or a space pirate or a pilot or a spy or a well respected scientist or an avant garde film maker or a best selling author what happened he does not know what happened he did not have it in him it was not there with fractured memories buttering together and now he is here on the bus listening to a woman talk to someone who wants more but all she wants is emotional support because people have been stealing her meat from the communal fridge and she is having a nervous breakdown. She is distraught. It sounds overwhelming. The evening feels like a hot wet towel beating him rhythmically on the everywhere. James Franco is not a renaissance man Seth McFarlane is not a renaissance man he is not a renaissance man so perhaps there is hope that one day he too could be called a renaissance man but just so he can in a petulant fit reject the title. Oskar Schindler was a Sudetenland German. The clouds are still. The cups are still. He does not know how many times he lied today. Were there lies? Were they lies? He is not sure if professional confidence is the same as a lie if after the event he turned out to be wrong. He cooks an omelette he eats some mixed nuts. He writes he procrastinates he worries he frets he plays the piano he drinks a cold coffee he finds a torch in his bedroom. It is not his torch. He wonders who it belongs to and where it came from he wishes it were magic it is definitely not magic although it lights up the dark and that is a kind of magic he forgets what he was saying he forgets what he was writing he progresses and then he regresses. He feels the helter skelter of life. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He gets on a bus. He sees a piece of paper on a seat. He picks up the paper and reads the outside of the folded up piece of paper it reads

Hey! Read this!

on one side and

Hey you! Read this!

on the other folded side. He opens up the piece of paper and reads:

Dear friend,

I have some good news! There is someone who loves you dearly, enough to die for you. His name is Jesus Christ,…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He gets on a bus. He sees a piece of paper on a seat. He picks up the paper and reads the outside of the folded up piece of paper it reads

Hey! Read this!

on one side and

Hey you! Read this!

on the other folded side. He opens up the piece of paper and reads:

Dear friend,

I have some good news! There is someone who loves you dearly, enough to die for you. His name is Jesus Christ,…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He gets on a bus. He sees a piece of paper on a seat. He picks up the paper and reads the outside of the folded up piece of paper it reads

Hey! Read this!

on one side and

Hey you! Read this!

on the other folded side. He opens up the piece of paper and reads:

 

Dear friend,

I have some good news! There is someone who loves you dearly, enough to die for you. His name is Jesus Christ, and He came to pay for our sins. He overcame all of our failure and shame, and in Him we find life. No matter what pain you feel, I promise, that someone cares. I was once an atheist, and I used to cut myself. I thought about taking my own life, but then I met a friend who showed me the good news of Jesus. He promises new life, and he wants the same for you. No matter how bad you feel, no matter what you think of yourself, Jesus loves you more than you could imagine. If you have questions about faith or want to know more about Christianity, I’d encourage you to find a church. There is one that meets at — —– theater on – Street in G——–n, Sunday at 10am. God bless you and take heart! God is with us!

Love,

A brother in Christ

 

The writing is neat and small and written in blue pen. It seems heartfelt but he probably won’t visit the theater to meet with Jesus. He folds up the paper and puts it into his pocket where it will remain for months forgotten and spinning and dissolving in the wash. There are so many people to be saved but saved from what? Each other and themselves. He eats some spinach and some quinoa and some lentils and drinks coffee and his ideas are shut down at work and his dreams keep him going all the way to his bed. He goes to sleep there on his sleeping bed.

 


He wakes up to The smell of Cut grass and gasoline. Jailed journalists in Egypt. Convicted editor…

He wakes up to The smell of Cut grass and gasoline. Jailed journalists in Egypt. Convicted editor in England. Helicopter gunships given to Egypt by America. Impressed British Prime Minister. He drinks a coffee. He drinks some water. He tries a push up. it is marginally successful. He tries a pull up. He cannot pull up. He rests two eggs and a zucchini drowned in yellow mustard. It does not taste…

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He wakes up to The smell of Cut grass and gasoline. Jailed journalists in Egypt. Convicted editor…

He wakes up to The smell of Cut grass and gasoline. Jailed journalists in Egypt. Convicted editor in England. Helicopter gunships given to Egypt by America. Impressed British Prime Minister. He drinks a coffee. He drinks some water. He tries a push up. it is marginally successful. He tries a pull up. He cannot pull up. He rests two eggs and a zucchini drowned in yellow mustard. It does not taste…

View On WordPress

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up to The smell of Cut grass and gasoline. Jailed journalists in Egypt. Convicted editor in England. Helicopter gunships given to Egypt by America. Impressed British Prime Minister. He drinks a coffee. He drinks some water. He tries a push up. it is marginally successful. He tries a pull up. He cannot pull up. He rests two eggs and a zucchini drowned in yellow mustard. It does not taste as desperate as it sounds. It is hot outside like a sauna but a sauna he would happily spend hours in sitting next to hot coals fanning himself. He works magic with lights. He walks into traffic but as luck would have it is synchronous with the red light. This is an accident but no one would know that from his demeanor. Deep inside he weeps with relief. He runs onto the train. All the carriages are new there are new carriages. He is confused. He remembers Rik Mayall is dead. This makes him sad. He liked Rik Mayall for making him laugh. He remembers drinking vodka at School one weekend for the first time or the second time in a classrom at School and watching Bottom Live and being drunk and laughing loudly laughing too loudly because that’s what he thought The Drunk People did and he was drunk and wanted desperately to be liked as he is still desperate to be  liked but that part of him is shielded protected less powerful now but ready at any moment to reclaim a throne. Then he remembers a story sometime someone told him about Rik Mayall who did an unpleasant thing but was that a dream everyone is unpleasant and confidences like that are not to be shared. He watches his past crumble like dry sandcastles. All the dry sandcastles blowing up pretty beige clouds in the intermittent breeze. He shouldn’t be thinking about masturbation on the elevator but he is. He could grind one out here and no one would know would they no one would care they would film it and he would be YouTube famous which is still famous. He watches as passengers help an old man find a wallet. He does not help. He does not need to the old man already has too much help. He is happy to get his wallet back which he dropped at the entrance to the bus. This happened in the morning. Now it is the evening. So much has happened already today. He eats some tasty food. He reads Gore Vidal novels. He inhales the sweet narcotic of America’s Got Talent through his eyes. He watches a beautiful dress being worn perfectly. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He remembers no dreams. He drinks coffee and eats cereal. He takes a shower. He takes the elevator. He takes the bus. He takes another elevator. He types. He writes. He drinks another coffee. He has a conversation. He applies make-up. He eats turkey meatballs and tomato sauce. They are good. They sustain him. He enjoys them. He savours them. Mouths flap about Iraq and about…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He remembers no dreams. He drinks coffee and eats cereal. He takes a shower. He takes the elevator. He takes the bus. He takes another elevator. He types. He writes. He drinks another coffee. He has a conversation. He applies make-up. He eats turkey meatballs and tomato sauce. They are good. They sustain him. He enjoys them. He savours them. Mouths flap about Iraq and about…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He remembers no dreams. He drinks coffee and eats cereal. He takes a shower. He takes the elevator. He takes the bus. He takes another elevator. He types. He writes. He drinks another coffee. He has a conversation. He applies make-up. He eats turkey meatballs and tomato sauce. They are good. They sustain him. He enjoys them. He savours them. Mouths flap about Iraq and about Afghanistan and the injustice of imprisoning journalists in Egypt but remain quiet about imprisoning lawyers in America. He gets too excited about the opening of a new Shake Shack and not energized enough about the crumbling infrastructure of the Western World. He listens to a woman channel his dead father to his half-sister. The woman doesn’t even change her voice. She should make more effort being a spirit medium she should at least do voices and lock the door of the room she is in so her son doesn’t come in and ask for a snack and close the window so that the roadworks outside aren’t overwhelming the recording and not give false hope or closure with cold reading but this is all too much to ask for and it probably will help someone somewhere life is difficult enough without letting people cope with tragedy in their own way. He walks. He stands. He sits. He waits. He reads. He walks. He cooks rice and broccoli and cauliflower and soy sauce and he eats it and he drinks water and he watches Lawrence O’Donnell return to television with a fine beard but he doesn’t listen to the words because they will be the same words as before and not bad for that reason but he is tired and he can’t think and doesn’t want to concentrate on relentless horror on the outside because he is busy enough with relentless horror on the inside. He lies down and watches sleep take him away.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He does not know why this happens. There is a loud direct voice informing him that this is a fire alarm and everyone must leave the building by the closest exit but not the elevator do not use the elevator dear God please do not use the elevator. He wakes up more. She wakes up. The cat wakes up. They try to wrestle the cat into a bag. The cat wins. The cat is not in the bag. The cat…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He does not know why this happens. There is a loud direct voice informing him that this is a fire alarm and everyone must leave the building by the closest exit but not the elevator do not use the elevator dear God please do not use the elevator. He wakes up more. She wakes up. The cat wakes up. They try to wrestle the cat into a bag. The cat wins. The cat is not in the bag. The cat…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He does not know why this happens. There is a loud direct voice informing him that this is a fire alarm and everyone must leave the building by the closest exit but not the elevator do not use the elevator dear God please do not use the elevator. He wakes up more. She wakes up. The cat wakes up. They try to wrestle the cat into a bag. The cat wins. The cat is not in the bag. The cat looks defiant. The alarm is still going. They have to leave. The cat remains. They walk down the stairs hoping it is a false alarm so as not to have a cat death car crash on their hands on his hands he does not know how she feels and he never asks. There are other pockets of people walking down the stairs. It is the middle of the night. It is raining outside. It is humid. It is entertaining to see what clothes people throw on in an emergency. Everyone looks like poorly dressed clowns. The alarm is a false alarm. Walking back up eight flights of stairs. The alarm starts again. They all pause for a moment tired and reckless they do not turn round but continue walking back to their apartments. Lying down they try to fall asleep for hours they try to fall asleep but they fail to fall asleep then they both realise they have been awake for hours and they weep and laugh with relief and with joy at their shared agony and the cat is asleep and hold no bridge at being left behind even though it turned out to be a false alarm and it would have been fine anyway but even so the cat remains magnanimous at their treachery. The cat will use it later, no doubt. They read then they sleep then the day is underway and the sun is out and the pollen count is low and the sandwiches are full of meat and the glasses are full of beer and full of lemonade and the football is entertaining and the day is a good day but for the wars and the mass incarceration and the poisons and the corruption and the fragility but these are only background noise for now they will be the main event soon enough so he ignored them until the time when he won’t vs able to ignore them anymore. He reads Rebecca Solnit. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He showers. He eats a banana. He is roasted by the sun. He imagines Tony Blair weeping in a windowless room rocking back and forth. He eats some tasty chicken and spinach. He watches headless chickens dance. They strut and they dance. He drinks a glass of water. He asks some questions. He writes some words on some paper. He sorts out his paperwork. He finds useless pieces of paper…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He showers. He eats a banana. He is roasted by the sun. He imagines Tony Blair weeping in a windowless room rocking back and forth. He eats some tasty chicken and spinach. He watches headless chickens dance. They strut and they dance. He drinks a glass of water. He asks some questions. He writes some words on some paper. He sorts out his paperwork. He finds useless pieces of paper…

View On WordPress

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He showers. He eats a banana. He is roasted by the sun. He imagines Tony Blair weeping in a windowless room rocking back and forth. He eats some tasty chicken and spinach. He watches headless chickens dance. They strut and they dance. He drinks a glass of water. He asks some questions. He writes some words on some paper. He sorts out his paperwork. He finds useless pieces of paper but he keeps them just in case he might need them in the future. He remonstrates with the fridge. He repeats some of these actions. He fills a red pepper with rice and spinach and kale and hot sauce. He roasts the red pepper but even that and the hot sauce will not dampen down the taste of kale. Kale cuts through everything. The air is boiling outside. So hot is refracts the air and everything is seen as through satin stockings. He reads some Robert Bellah and the civil religion of America. The cult of America. He reads about the late Victorian Holocaust watches Thomas Piketty in a debate on British Television Jeremy Paxman cycling on a bicycle with the Mayor of London all jolly boys together at the same clubs at the same schools colleges picnics artificial debate illusion of dissent he tries to build a house on a purple planet that rains poison green liquid at regular intervals. Some of the creatures are trying to kill him but he has a large sword and a natty bow and arrow. He needs to find silver so he can create a beacon to escape the planet. He cannot find any silver. He has been searching for a long time. He is tired. He looks at his laundry go round and round and round in the dryer. He falls asleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day

He wakes up. He sees stains on his chair. He does not look closer to see what they are. Then he looks closer. He wishes he hadn’t looked closer. The bus driver improvised the bus routes traveling down roads none of the regular passengers have seen before. He watches a written sizzle and shot on the sidewalk. It is very hot. He moves the worm to the grass in the shade with the edge of his foot but…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day

He wakes up. He sees stains on his chair. He does not look closer to see what they are. Then he looks closer. He wishes he hadn’t looked closer. The bus driver improvised the bus routes traveling down roads none of the regular passengers have seen before. He watches a written sizzle and shot on the sidewalk. It is very hot. He moves the worm to the grass in the shade with the edge of his foot but…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day


He wakes up. He sees stains on his chair. He does not look closer to see what they are. Then he looks closer. He wishes he hadn’t looked closer. The bus driver improvised the bus routes traveling down roads none of the regular passengers have seen before. He watches a written sizzle and shot on the sidewalk. It is very hot. He moves the worm to the grass in the shade with the edge of his foot but the worm still bubbles and spits. It is to late for the worm. It is to late for every worm. Every one. Everyone. He buys some lentils. More of his villagers die. He only had the villagers left. He should never have begun construction on that mine. He feels totally responsible. He hopes the orchard will grow in time and offer sustenance along with the fishing and the hunting that keeps the remaining villagers clinging on to life. The well built houses are empty. The villagers must feel the loss every time they pass it to go into the forest to weep our whatever it is they do when they are hidden behind digital trees. He sees the renegade economist Simon Johnson on the train. He sees the gentleman from Subway who sometimes makes his sandwiches on the train. They are both wearing caps. Simon is wearing a white cap. He also has a red back pack. Subway is wearing a red hat. He will ask Subways name next time he purchases a sandwich or he will look at the name tag on his shirt and remember the name on it. He is beaten down by the heat when he leaves the train station. A violinist plays. He buys mixed nuts. He enjoys the air conditioning and engages in conversation with polite staff members who would rather not be there. He drinks lots of water. He talks. He quaffs. He considers. He thinks. He draws. He presses buttons. He talks intensely and without clarity. He is misunderstood. He is tired. He eats yoghurt. He writes and dreams and is overwhelmed. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He hugs. He showers. He kisses. He gets a taxi. He waits for the yellow bus for the last time. He is emotional. He gets on the train. A woman is wearing enormous shoes. Iraq is collapsing. The helicopters from Saigon moment is happening and nobody with power in America seems to know what to do other than ensure the world it is not Americas fault. ISIS are making their way down Iraq…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He hugs. He showers. He kisses. He gets a taxi. He waits for the yellow bus for the last time. He is emotional. He gets on the train. A woman is wearing enormous shoes. Iraq is collapsing. The helicopters from Saigon moment is happening and nobody with power in America seems to know what to do other than ensure the world it is not Americas fault. ISIS are making their way down Iraq…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He hugs. He showers. He kisses. He gets a taxi. He waits for the yellow bus for the last time. He is emotional. He gets on the train. A woman is wearing enormous shoes. Iraq is collapsing. The helicopters from Saigon moment is happening and nobody with power in America seems to know what to do other than ensure the world it is not Americas fault. ISIS are making their way down Iraq looking and taking over everything. Louis CK makes plea to TMZ to stop showing footage of Tracy Morgan car crash. They will probably keep showing it and then others will show it to show how awful TMZ are because that is how the media works. Then he goes to sleep.

.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He wakes up. Maya Angelou is dead. Then a real estate millionaire is giving out clues on Twitter to find money. He is seen as a hero but maybe he is a slum landlord a racist and he finds glee in manipulating the poor and desperate he makes them take pictures maybe he has a wall of them. He is making the greedy and desperate and poor his puppet playthings. An old man pulls a car with…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He wakes up. Maya Angelou is dead. Then a real estate millionaire is giving out clues on Twitter to find money. He is seen as a hero but maybe he is a slum landlord a racist and he finds glee in manipulating the poor and desperate he makes them take pictures maybe he has a wall of them. He is making the greedy and desperate and poor his puppet playthings. An old man pulls a car with…

View On WordPress

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He wakes up. Maya Angelou is dead. Then a real estate millionaire is giving out clues on Twitter to find money. He is seen as a hero but maybe he is a slum landlord a racist and he finds glee in manipulating the poor and desperate he makes them take pictures maybe he has a wall of them. He is making the greedy and desperate and poor his puppet playthings. An old man pulls a car with his teeth. A little boy plays the piano beautifully. Maya Angelou is dead. Cursory repeated conversations about mental health that are copy pasted from the last murderous rampage. It is national burger day. There is not much pollen but it is hot. Maya Angelou is dead. There is not much hope in the world. The powerful cling onto their power. The weak are left tumbling in the dark with only the infrequent sugar rush for company. Maya Angelou is dead. There is advice on morning television from sexperts. Should you love him or should you leave him? He does not wait for the answer. He accidentally strokes a woman’s hand when he tries to hold the door open. It is humid outside. He eats a salad. He reads. Thomas Piketty is still the topic of conversation. President Obama announces a new anti terrorist fund. It sounds terrifying. It sounds like a new school of the Americas. It sounds like a license for autocratic regimes to terrorize in the name of power and lies. It is $5 billion of oppression delivered by the American tax payer to perceived enemies of dictators and money mongers and oil oligarchs. A friend reminds him of an old history lesson oskar schindler was a sudetenland german. He watches the new Tom cruise movie. It is groundhogs day with aliens. It has a bad third act a poor ending of no consequence or jeopardy yet there are some good jokes but he would still not recommend it groundhogs day 2 edge of tomorrow shallow with a fun first act. Laughter in the theatre until a biker asks him to pee on him. He declines the offer. Ice cream and running for the bus and tasty meats and Maya Angelou is dead and sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He sees a Dog chasing two geese. He has a Happy bus driver. Joy heartache pensive children waiting for yellow bus graduates in gowns rich unemployed people with debt gathering to commiserate. Dreams deferred. Coffee. Fresh fruit. Salad. Swelling heart. Confusion. Got to make it past forty. Hopelessness. One hour a day. One mine at a time. Disappointment. Additional failures.…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He sees a Dog chasing two geese. He has a Happy bus driver. Joy heartache pensive children waiting for yellow bus graduates in gowns rich unemployed people with debt gathering to commiserate. Dreams deferred. Coffee. Fresh fruit. Salad. Swelling heart. Confusion. Got to make it past forty. Hopelessness. One hour a day. One mine at a time. Disappointment. Additional failures.…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He sees a Dog chasing two geese. He has a Happy bus driver. Joy heartache pensive children waiting for yellow bus graduates in gowns rich unemployed people with debt gathering to commiserate. Dreams deferred. Coffee. Fresh fruit. Salad. Swelling heart. Confusion. Got to make it past forty. Hopelessness. One hour a day. One minute at a time. Disappointment. Additional failures. Squirrels. Birds. Memories. Subtext. What is the subtext. What is the text? What of the surtext? What is consistent? Something falls. Bioshock Infinite is not. Binary at best. Troubling at worst. Four old white men playing tennis together in the morning. Long time friends perhaps. What awful crimes have they committed. What terrible pact keeps them together? What secrets do they hide on fear of grim torture and drawn out death? Chinese spying on American companies. Bold hippocrisy of Eric holder is hilarious. Do what we say not what it’s revealed by secret documents we do. The only difference seems to be the actors not the acting. There is no coherence. He writes. He progresses. He is exactly where he wants to be which is exactly where he shouldn’t be allowed to go. He eats a salad. He prepares himself for the Morrow. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. There is an excellent electric guitarist with a hamburger with vampire wings tattoo by the metro. He enjoys the music but not as much as the vampire winged hamburger tattoo. The air conditioning in the carriage makes it stink like baked rubber. The air conditioning is probably not working or it is a plan to discourage passengers. He makes an animation. It is mountains and the sun…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. There is an excellent electric guitarist with a hamburger with vampire wings tattoo by the metro. He enjoys the music but not as much as the vampire winged hamburger tattoo. The air conditioning in the carriage makes it stink like baked rubber. The air conditioning is probably not working or it is a plan to discourage passengers. He makes an animation. It is mountains and the sun…

View On WordPress

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. There is an excellent electric guitarist with a hamburger with vampire wings tattoo by the metro. He enjoys the music but not as much as the vampire winged hamburger tattoo. The air conditioning in the carriage makes it stink like baked rubber. The air conditioning is probably not working or it is a plan to discourage passengers. He makes an animation. It is mountains and the sun rising above the mountains. It is more impressive than he expected but it serves no purpose. An old Chicago Whitesocks fan talks to him about baseball. It is a human connection brought about by a misunderstanding and it is deeply moving and important to the shape of the day. A woman honks her horn but she is smiling not honking the horn in anger but to get the attention of a friend. He gets into the car. They smile and she drives off. He eats left over turkey burger then spends an hour considering the cleverness of that decision in a small windowless room. He finds a piece of paper. His writing is on it. He had written gender divide anatomical sex gender divide the technologists are totalitarian plutocrats theocratic swelling he does not know what it means or why he wrote those words. He does some writing. Herakles is not the most straightforward hero. Complex sociopath. He finishes Piketty’s Capital and wonders if it will signal the change of anything. He thinks back to earlier in the day when he was marginally younger and then he goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. Does he? He does. Vibrating pillow. Tweaks. Hazelnut coffee. Rice and peanut butter and broccoli and cake and cakes and cake. Glenn Greenwald is charming and speaks quickly. Glenn Greenwald is tired. Glenn Greenwald’s film crew films behind the scenes of his epic book tour. He reads. He does some art. He drinks some water. He imagines he is on a hill swash buckling a small group of…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. Does he? He does. Vibrating pillow. Tweaks. Hazelnut coffee. Rice and peanut butter and broccoli and cake and cakes and cake. Glenn Greenwald is charming and speaks quickly. Glenn Greenwald is tired. Glenn Greenwald’s film crew films behind the scenes of his epic book tour. He reads. He does some art. He drinks some water. He imagines he is on a hill swash buckling a small group of…

View On WordPress

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. Does he? He does. Vibrating pillow. Tweaks. Hazelnut coffee. Rice and peanut butter and broccoli and cake and cakes and cake. Glenn Greenwald is charming and speaks quickly. Glenn Greenwald is tired. Glenn Greenwald’s film crew films behind the scenes of his epic book tour. He reads. He does some art. He drinks some water. He imagines he is on a hill swash buckling a small group of animated skeletons. It is night but the fires from the burning forest below and the large full moon light the desperate action on the cliff top. He slips the skeletons rally and dash but it was but a feint and a twists and with ease slices them all over the clouds fading them on the rocks below but the night has only just begun. He is not hungry but he eats some vegetables. It makes him feel better. He probably eats a taco. He lies down. He plays a video game that is supposed to be art. It probably is art. It probably is overrated. It is overrated. He watches a man get onto a bus. He watches a woman get off a bus. He watches pixels explode in misty clouds of blood, digital viscera smears itself across the screen. He is moved to disgust then unmoved because it isn’t real but maybe it is real. Then he reads. Then he sleeps.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He is neither a lark nor an owl. He is exhausted. He drinks a coffee. He listens to Glenn Greenwald. Glen Greenwald sounds surprisingly polite and restrained as he talks to Matt Lauer. He does not shower. It is hot outside. Parched lips. He gets on the bus. He sits on the bus. He gets off the bus. He walks to work. He takes the elevator. He has followed a woman all the way from the…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He is neither a lark nor an owl. He is exhausted. He drinks a coffee. He listens to Glenn Greenwald. Glen Greenwald sounds surprisingly polite and restrained as he talks to Matt Lauer. He does not shower. It is hot outside. Parched lips. He gets on the bus. He sits on the bus. He gets off the bus. He walks to work. He takes the elevator. He has followed a woman all the way from the…

View On WordPress

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He is neither a lark nor an owl. He is exhausted. He drinks a coffee. He listens to Glenn Greenwald. Glen Greenwald sounds surprisingly polite and restrained as he talks to Matt Lauer. He does not shower. It is hot outside. Parched lips. He gets on the bus. He sits on the bus. He gets off the bus. He walks to work. He takes the elevator. He has followed a woman all the way from the bus to the office. He tries to maintain his distance but this fails when he gets in the same elevator. Luckily they get off at different floors. He has another coffee. He eats too many cookies. He is bloated. Already he wants the day to be over. It is not over. It is still going on. It is still continuing. It is not ending. The broken people of Homs return to their broken city. Everyone looks on in sympathy then returns to their candy crush bejewelled high scores. Then he writes some things then he tries to stay awake. It is really hard to stay awake today. Then he lies down. Then he reads but none of the words go in they slide off his eyes and form a puddle round his body on the bed. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He is neither a lark nor an owl. He is exhausted. He drinks a coffee. He listens to Glenn Greenwald. Glen Greenwald sounds surprisingly polite and restrained as he talks to Matt Lauer. He does not shower. It is hot outside. Parched lips. He gets on the bus. He sits on the bus. He gets off the bus. He walks to work. He takes the elevator. He has followed a woman all the way from the…

View On WordPress

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. He is neither a lark nor an owl. He is exhausted. He drinks a coffee. He listens to Glenn Greenwald. Glen Greenwald sounds surprisingly polite and restrained as he talks to Matt Lauer. He does not shower. It is hot outside. Parched lips. He gets on the bus. He sits on the bus. He gets off the bus. He walks to work. He takes the elevator. He has followed a woman all the way from the…

View On WordPress

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. Dirty wars Inside Job The Great Divide. These the things do not make for a happy-go-lucky weekend. bioshock infinite with it’s attempts at depth infinite shallows. Votes in India enormous democracy. Hidden poverty rampant corruption suicide on a hill. A house explodes after gunshot is heard. The girls are freed into the arms of Islam. Parents are doubtful. Leo Tolstoy imparts advice…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. Dirty Wars Inside Job The Divide. These the things do not make for a happy-go-lucky weekend. bioshock infinite with it’s attempts at depth infinite shallows. Votes in India enormous democracy. Hidden poverty rampant corruption suicide on a hill. A house explodes after gunshot is heard. The girls are freed into the arms of Islam. Parents are doubtful. Leo Tolstoy imparts advice about art and religion. He eats an ice cream. He is getting fat. He eats a cookie. He is getting fat. He eats a lunchable. He is fat and sad. He drinks a coffee and it makes him feel better for a little while. He drinks a capri sun. He eats another ice cream. Will this torment never end? It is hot outside. Like an oven. Like an oven of pain. A painful oven. Not that hot. He goes inside and the air conditioning is welcoming. Drones fly over head. The Epic of Gilgamesh is mentioned. He waits to be targeted but he is not a high value target and he is not carrying a cell phone and he eats another ice cream. He reads Dollarocracy and feels like he needs a wire brush and hose down. American political financing is a giant fetid worm sliding and pulsing it’s way across the country as it feeds in at one hole and spews gelatinous Excreta out of the other swelling it’s swollen body expanding as it goes. It is hot wet and dark outside. It is night. It has rained. A context free fight been two relative by marriage in a lift spreads across the internet and diminishes everyone. He writes and writes and writes. He watches Veep. It is funny. He watches Late Night starring Jimmy Fallon. It is funny. Neil Young is soft spoken and his voice trembles as he sings. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. Aching muscles and bones. He showers. He walks. An old lady walking very slowly up a very long elevator. She is wearing her Sunday hat. Two lovers talking quietly. Their speech barely breath. Smiling. A pack of Marlboro reds on the bench. Empty – he checks. He remembers the happiness of a good cigarette.Ladies in pink ready to walk for breast cancer. His mother dead on a slab skin…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.

He wakes up. Aching muscles and bones. He showers. He walks. An old lady walking very slowly up a very long elevator. She is wearing her Sunday hat. Two lovers talking quietly. Their speech barely breath. Smiling. A pack of Marlboro reds on the bench. Empty – he checks. He remembers the happiness of a good cigarette.Ladies in pink ready to walk for breast cancer. His mother dead on a slab skin…

View On WordPress

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. Aching muscles and bones. He showers. He walks. An old lady walking very slowly up a very long elevator. She is wearing her Sunday hat. Two lovers talking quietly. Their speech barely breath. Smiling. A pack of Marlboro reds on the bench. Empty – he checks. He remembers the happiness of a good cigarette.Ladies in pink ready to walk for breast cancer. His mother dead on a slab skin metallic and cold from cancer. She never smoked. No dissipation dispossession dispersion no skate boarding no roller skating. Does anyone still rollerskate? No loitering no littering no leering no fun. James MacAvoy nearly gets angry when he is called English by Jimmy Fallon. Then he tells an amusing story about actor shenanigans which he tells as he laughs and flowers up the language but the narrative of the story seems to be three men cornering a woman and shooting her with bb guns. Jimmy is awkward. James realizes his story sounds terrible. The audience laughs because they are delirious from lack of sustenance. It is another triumphant Late Night. The Scottish sense of humor is a strange sense of humor. As inexplicable as the still burning enmity against the English. Lines snake out of the embassies of the conquerors British German French and others. Happy white tourists with bags of booty. Drinks and caveman politics. Outcasts and plutocrats. Dirty unwashed sky. London tops the list of billionaires in the world. The Trussel Trust Foodbank has seen an increase of 163% of local people. The rich have won they have won they have won their sucking tubes vacuuming up all the meaty wealth wherever they find it. All that is left is the ragged wasteland of outdoor malls and glassy eyed denizens of hopelessness. He watches Inside Job. He watches Dirty War. He reads The Divide. It is not a recipe to create a happiness cake. He goes to sleep.