And behold, there was a great earthquake and the large egg did crack from the top and Jesus … More
Then sent Jesus two disciples, saying unto them, “Go into the village over against you, and straightway ye shall find … More
It is Saint Patrick’s Day next week. The Yearly Bacchanal is not a time for introspection but perhaps, this year, … More
What better way to mourn the loss of a pet at the Animal Hospital than to buy a new pet … More
I believe that this scientifically accurate diagram covers either end of all the experiences possible on the human spectrum. It … More
Then look no further than these stylish spandex pantaloons. Ignore the tears of your fellow yogis. … More
It’s nearly Valentine’s Day. What better way to celebrate that perfect union betwixt you and your special one by gifting … More
I made this. It is the best thing for holding candies or poison* but not both at the same time. … More
Look after your inner child. If you don’t it will eat your tasty organs.
Every time a bell rings an angel does a fart. Christmas Science. You’re welcome.
If you have been naughty there is no hope for you. He will get through all of your defenses and … More
Today you will realize that everything you knew is wrong. Luckily you previously thought that the world was flat, apples … More
Today the end of the year creeps ever closer. There is no escaping it. Unless you are stuck in a … More
If you find yourself up the creek without a paddle You would be best to realize that even if you … More
Today success will come in the form of a bearded man handing out gifts. So if you see a Walt … More
And I don’t even want to begin to imagine what that bear is doing. I stared at the animated sign, … More
Today is a day to count your blessings. You have seven but they are rapidly approaching their sell by date. … More
If you play your cards right you will have your own flag by the end of the day. If you … More
You better not shout, You better not cry, You better not pout, I’m telling you why Because no one can … More
Egg nog runs through Santa’s veins. That is why he remains untouched by vampires. You, however, will not be so … More
You will invent something incredible today. Oh, sorry, that’s been invented already. Sorry to get your hopes up.