Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. Thor 2 Anthony Hopkins seems half asleep but everyone else seems wide awake. The Hunger Games tiny little Peeta Mellark gets beaten up by everyone. Captain America is more nuanced that he thought it would be. The Dark Knight Rises is…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. Thor 2 Anthony Hopkins seems half asleep but everyone else seems wide awake. The Hunger Games tiny little Peeta Mellark gets beaten up by everyone. Captain America is more nuanced that he thought it would be. The Dark Knight Rises is…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. Thor 2 Anthony Hopkins seems half asleep but everyone else seems wide awake. The Hunger Games tiny little Peeta Mellark gets beaten up by everyone. Captain America is more nuanced that he thought it would be. The Dark Knight Rises is excellently entertaining but it’s plot is held together more by faith and goodwill than solid writing. Then he goes to a Chinese Tea House and eats lovely food and drinks lovely lime and ginger infusions except the lime looks suspiciously like a badly disguised lemon but it tastes so good and he makes a racist joke which is awful so awful that he cannot repeat it so he doesn’t feel he can ask for a lime instead of a lemon and he didn’t want to make the racist joke but it just came out without thinking and clearly he is still not the enlightened being he likes to pretend he is. Then they have a lovely caramel apple spice and then he is taught about the secret Starbucks menu and his mind is blown and then he double checks with the staff and they smile and nod knowingly at him and he is suddenly in a very special club. Then he reads about the Arab Uprising and it is no longer called the Arab Spring because there have been too many Springs now and one long awful winter and there is no freedom and joy and cafes and employment and meaningful change and then They Syrian Civil War continues and the horror continues and it continues and it continues and then his love makes a glorious winter drink with grand marnier and milk and cinnamon and it tastes like Christmas and there there are cuddles and love and Martin Luther King writes the letter from Birmingham jail and many years later people read it and are inspired by it and then there is ice skating and horses are being used for medical research and then being sold into the food chain but what if the research is for super strength or invisibility and those powers were transferred to civilians surely that would be worth the price of a horse shank to get super powers and then antiobiotics are going to be banned in beef but how is he going to get his medication now and how will he protect himself from mrsa and disease and death if he does not get all the cow and chicke medication through his eating of cow and chicken. He is worried and feels he will have to take more pills for his various imagined ailments. Then there is  cranberry flavored ginger ale and cranberry flavored sierra mist cranberry flavored cranberries and everything is wonderful and everything is more and it is late and a boop made frmo bits and data is not a flesh and blood boop but as boops go it is better than no boop at all and then he sleeps.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. The world is covered in ice. He falls asleep and misses his shower window and he slides and slips all the way to the bus stop and takes twenty minutes to walk a ten minute journey and watches the bus drive away far away from him and then he…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. The world is covered in ice. He falls asleep and misses his shower window and he slides and slips all the way to the bus stop and takes twenty minutes to walk a ten minute journey and watches the bus drive away far away from him and then he…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. The world is covered in ice. He falls asleep and misses his shower window and he slides and slips all the way to the bus stop and takes twenty minutes to walk a ten minute journey and watches the bus drive away far away from him and then he get the train and then he gets a seat and it is warm on the train and he falls asleep and nearly misses his stop and then his work day is very busy and then he has some lunch which is old pizza from the night before that he brought in tupperware and heated up in the microwave. Then there are interviews and meetings and then he goes to American University library for a party and then there is a lockdown and everyone is told to shelter in place and this is the first time he has had to do this and it all seems very calm but there is the potential for horror that never goes away but there are secure areas that he checks out as he wanders and there are cookies and there is coffee and water and even as the heat increases and teenagers make out in the shadowy corners of the library life seems to continue and then it turns out that it is a false alarm and the armed man was an off duty police officer but a false alarm is better than a nightmare massacre and as long as this country is drenched in guns and bullets and psychosis the false alarm will always be preferable to the it will probably be okay that’s probably fake gun that person is not to be feared let’s just go on about our lives and not warn anyone that their death is imminent. Then pizza then cuddles then sleep and sweet safety and relief.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. It is 4am. He turns the television on and watches the Nelson Mandela memorial service in the stadium in South Africa and he watches as Bill Clinton glad hands and Hillary Clinton hugs and kisses and Barack Obama and Raul Castro shake hands…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. It is 4am. He turns the television on and watches the Nelson Mandela memorial service in the stadium in South Africa and he watches as Bill Clinton glad hands and Hillary Clinton hugs and kisses and Barack Obama and Raul Castro shake hands…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. It is 4am. He turns the television on and watches the Nelson Mandela memorial service in the stadium in South Africa and he watches as Bill Clinton glad hands and Hillary Clinton hugs and kisses and Barack Obama and Raul Castro shake hands and he thinks he hears nearby in Washington the sound of Republicans exploding and anti-Communists melting and Joe McCarthy clawing at his coffin desperately trying to come to the surface to wreak bloody meat-tearing havoc. Then he sorts out some photographs and then he has a coffee and then he eats some cereal and then he listens to Obama’s resounding speech which is full of wonderful phrases and delightful ideas but unfortunately bears no relation to the real world but what does that matter in this day and age where lofty rhetoric is more important than ground level progress. Then he walks through the snow and takes lots of photographs of the snow and then he misses the bus but he cannot run ineffectually or efectually because of the slush and the slip sliding snow and then he waits for the bus and gets on the bus He learns words in Spanish and words in Mandarin and then he gets on the train and he falls asleep and he wakes up and arrives at work and a friend arrives from Palestine and he talks with him for a while and then he has a coffee and then he eats a cookie and one of his bosses is leaving and another boss will take his place and he eats some food and he eats an avocado and he plans the holidays and he worries about his budget and he talks on a web camera and he laughs and he jokes. Then there is the selfie that rings out throughout the world and Obama is smiling but then everyone is smiling but then one frame captures Michelle Obama not smiling so everyone assumes she is unhappy but it probably just caught a moment when she was giving her face a rest from smiling because the arena seemed to be full of joy and life. Then he feels exhausted and has a little nap his head resting on the table in front of him then he does some more work and then he trudges home which takes a long long time and it is cold and yet the air is incredibly clean and pure and finally he returns home to pizza and love and left over breakfast coffee and then he sleeps.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He drinks coffee. He eats cereal. He eats cookies. This is not a healthy breakfast but he is still alive so it can’t have been too bad. Then he walks to the bus stop and gets on the bus and then gets on the train and there are no seats on the…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He drinks coffee. He eats cereal. He eats cookies. This is not a healthy breakfast but he is still alive so it can’t have been too bad. Then he walks to the bus stop and gets on the bus and then gets on the train and there are no seats on the…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He drinks coffee. He eats cereal. He eats cookies. This is not a healthy breakfast but he is still alive so it can’t have been too bad. Then he walks to the bus stop and gets on the bus and then gets on the train and there are no seats on the train so he walks through all the carriages past tired looking commuters until he finds a double seat where he can spread himself out and not have to intefere with the personal space of strangers. He watches the inside of his brain as it spreads confines triggering hopes and dreams as the world continues turning.  He watches as the magnification of Mandelification on all news networks over bears everything else. His glow extends to all comers and he is repurposed and remolded in whatever shape is seen fit for the moment. Everyone gets a piece of him and is thus cleansed but for a moment of their hideous acts. Everyone uses him passing him around using him for their own purposes but there is real Joy and happiness and what is wrong with that? Wrong when it is used to distract from the horror of powerful men and the system that keeps them in their power. But is that so wrong? That is so wrong he thinks. Then he goes to the National Christmas tree and looks at the tree and the toy trains and the White House with a flag at half mast and he feels love as he walks to Shake Shack and eats a glorious burger and is accosted by an army of drunk Santas and he thinks he may be hallucinating but then he realizes that he isn’t hallucinating and it is men getting drunk dressed as Father Christmas and he hopes that no children see this horror-show. Then there is lots of snow and there is Gingerbread custard which is the best flavour in the world and it would bring world peace if it were given to everyone he is sure and then he thinks that someone would probably try to control the supply of gingerbread custard and tax it and ban certain people from having it and then there would be a gingerbread war so perhaps it wouldn’t bring world peace after all. Then he watches Aziz Ansari and he is very funny but there is some victim shaming which makes him like the jokes less and then there is more walking through a beautiful cold clear Washington DC kept warm by love and then late night talking and idiot students driving a car covered in snow without any care for those who may be hit by the snow as it slides so fast off the bonnet as they drive down the highway. Then Protests banned at The University of London which seems to be something that doesn’t happen in free and democratic countries but then are there any free and democratic countries he thinks probably there are but he is just being polemical. Then the creator of The Wire talks about two Americas and Marx and he wonders if this means that there is a revolution coming but he always thinks there is a revolution coming and he is always wrong. Then he watches Saturday Night Live and he thinks that the new cast are doing a great job and the fact that a large chunk of old guard recently left is actually going to be a very good thing for the show and not a bad thing even though they still don’t manage to do very well with race or gender and there are too many white men who may in fact be one white man with different wigs he isn’t  sure. Then he gets into bed after taking photographs in the mist and the cold and he falls asleep wondering if terrorists using World of Warcraft is actually a good thing because they’ll get addicted to the game and then have no desire for terrorizing.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. It is early. It is mild. He is mild. He gets into the shower and he turns all taps to the correct temperature immediately. It is going to be a good day. He has a coffee and he eats a slice of pie and even though his car is now dead again and…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. It is early. It is mild. He is mild. He gets into the shower and he turns all taps to the correct temperature immediately. It is going to be a good day. He has a coffee and he eats a slice of pie and even though his car is now dead again and…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. It is early. It is mild. He is mild. He gets into the shower and he turns all taps to the correct temperature immediately. It is going to be a good day. He has a coffee and he eats a slice of pie and even though his car is now dead again and he still doesn’t have a driving license his life could be a lot worse and he thinks this is probably what love does it probably makes those things that were monstrous and awful that much more manageable at least for a time until love fades unless it grows and enrichens like a fine whiskey or expensive mouldy cheese. Then he reads about the way white people have tried to destroy black people in America and then he reads about someone who is developing a warp drive space ship for NASA. The Alcubierre Drive looks exciting but it may just be a case of NASA again desperately trying to get funding because everyone keeps ignoring them and forgetting how sexy and exciting space travel is so they trawl their memories of childhood science fiction stories for hooks that will snare the goldfish brained media. He learns about alien planets and birth control and listens to Birdland and the myth or reality that Russel Crowe is a fan of knitting the theft of lots of passwords and the chasm dividing girls toys and boys toys and the movies of 2013 none of which he has seen he does not watch them any more even though he used to love them he finds them empty and unsatisfying and they bring him no respite of relief or delight and they are all artifice and all surface and dripping in money. Then he eats his lunch which is chili and corn bread. Then he spends the afternoon planning and then the death of Nelson Mandela is announced and everything changes and he is moved and he has a lump in his throat and tears in his eyes as Jacob Zuma gets to read the announcement and bask in the golden glow and then the newsroom is a hive of activity and pictures are gathered and obituaries are broadcast and thoughts are requested and slowly the internet unfolds itself ever fast like a great tidal tongue licking and slaking it’s thirst on the information and everyone has a personal thought and a connection and then within a very short amount of time it is not about Nelson Mandela it is about politics and it is about famous people who met him and it is about who can post the most profound quote or the most interesting photograph or the most unusual interview and the icon is trundled over until it is time to watch the performance of A Sound of Music live on NBC the first live musical performance on American television for 50 years and it goes very well and everyone gives it a college try and makes a valiant effort and then people start using Mandela for their own purposes, to defame others, to question others, to prop up their own positions and it has not even been but three hours since his death was announced by the compression of time on the internet allows information to have the life cycle of a fly at the speed of a humming bird and there is no time for quiet reflection or meditation or why Russel Crowe was allowed to sing in Les Miserables or why Pierce Brosnan was allowed to sing in Mamma Mia or why Sean Connery was allowed to sing in D’arby O’Gill and The Little People and that Stephen Moyers is not that bad after all and as the hagiographies are corralled on the networks and the genuflections are given no one discusses the CIA involvement in Mandela’s capture or Mandela’s time as a supporter of violent resistance because then he would be in Guantanamo serving out a sentence without trial or hope of release and that would not be a good example for anyone to set. So Mandiba dies and he joins the pantheon of Ghandi of Lennon of Theresa of King of Russell of Sagan of Zinn of Addams of Coldicott and then the sweep of history continues on ever on and new trinkets are glanced at and new diversions and focused on and on the bus a lady hears of the death of Mandela and says who and her friend repeats the name and she says who again and then the name is repeated and the lady says who he he don’t pay my bills and then finally she finds somewhere in her memory the recollection of who Nelson Mandela is and she says a final time I hate to sound cruel but like I say he don’t pay my bills and this is true and he doesn’t pay her bills and whoever does is who is important to her and she leaves the bus now knowing who Nelson Mandela is and that he is dead but his life and his death have had little impact on her life because she has greater concerns the concerns of staying alive and paying her bills and feeding herself and her family and the heaviness of sentimentality for someone she has never met is not something she has the luxury of infusing her body with of considering of musing on as she carries on through the day after day after day living and dreaming and hoping for a better life for herself a life which does not touch the death of a man who don’t pay her bills. He considers this truth as he falls asleep and wonders what he can make of it. No one will dare to say what this woman said in the press or on the television. Everyone will emphasis the historical moment the storied history the game changing event and then they will all play candy crush in the commercial break and congratulate themselves on their book deals. He falls asleep to these conflicted confusing thoughts.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He is happy. A cat proceeds to press his buttocks into his face. He takes a shower. He drinks a coffee. He eats some toast. He is at work. He goes to the bathroom and he stands at the urinal and then he realises that he needs to shit so he…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He is happy. A cat proceeds to press his buttocks into his face. He takes a shower. He drinks a coffee. He eats some toast. He is at work. He goes to the bathroom and he stands at the urinal and then he realises that he needs to shit so he…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He is happy. A cat proceeds to press his buttocks into his face. He takes a shower. He drinks a coffee. He eats some toast. He is at work. He goes to the bathroom and he stands at the urinal and then he realises that he needs to shit so he manages to get to the toilet in time and he does a shit and he also urinates and he sits and thinks because that it was that little room is for for shitting and pissing and thinking and then he fills in a list of black writers and he has only read two books on a list of 100 and this makes him feel he has a large gap in his knowledge even though he is familiar with most of the books on the list. There will always never be enough time to read all the books he wants to read. Then he watches Glenn Greenwald eviscerate another journalist. Then he prepares for work and then he reads about ancient literature in Timbuktu and then he reads about white privelige written by someone with that thing which is rare and then he watches white people running things or ruining things but probably running things and then he hopes his car will be fixed and then he worries about money and then he thinks about amazing sex and then he worries about money again and he wonders what next year will bring and he hopes that he will get to see the national Christmas tree and he wonders why Joe Biden keeps getting let out to say things but perhaps he’s being let out because he says things and his filter free word soup is what his bigges strength is to obfuscate and misdirect like a political magician. Then he reads about black face in Bolivia and how white people said it wasn’t racist but of course it’s racist he thinks to himself then he eats thanksgiving for lunch again which is amazing and then later on in the evening he wonders how he got here and he really wants to drink wine but he has no wine so instead he writes words and adds the words up together and they are a lot of words but they don’t mean very much but he keeps them together anyway because in a few days time he might look back at them and find that they do mean something. Then he goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He forgets something terribly important and regrets it horribly as he desperately tries to make amends but cannot make amends because he finds himself balancing between two poles that may never balance themselves. Then he has a coffee and…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He forgets something terribly important and regrets it horribly as he desperately tries to make amends but cannot make amends because he finds himself balancing between two poles that may never balance themselves. Then he has a coffee and…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He forgets something terribly important and regrets it horribly as he desperately tries to make amends but cannot make amends because he finds himself balancing between two poles that may never balance themselves. Then he has a coffee and some lean pockets and considers the pain in his chest and the pain in his shoulders and wonders if they are related to his insensitivity or to his diet or to the stress that his car isn’t working again and he has no money to fix his car again or the fact that he ate pie for breakfast and now he feels nauseous. Then he worries about his job and he worries about his salary and he worries about Noam Chomsky  and he worries about Glenn Beck and Jeremy Paxman and Russel Brand and Brand Name Cereal and Serial Killers and The Killers. His beard is enormous and it keeps his face warm now that it is cold. He despairs of leaders but does not have the desire or the capacity or the skill to be one himself. He despairs of mainstream news and he despairs of alternative news. He despairs of facts and of analysis and he despairs of opinion and objectivity and power and oppression and then he has some chicken and some salad and then he has a very deep and powerful conversation that highlights his insensitivity and he hopes that he will do better and then he reads and then he falls asleep with The Daily Show bubbling in the background and then he wakes up unable to sleep and makes his tiny little army of men attack another tiny little army of men as, nearby, two bears snuffle in an abandoned campground.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He frees himself from unpleasant dreams that only leave ominous after images in his brain of a relationship gone horribly wrong and overbearing men and unsatisfied desire. Then he eats some more left overs from Thanksgiving and he tries to…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He frees himself from unpleasant dreams that only leave ominous after images in his brain of a relationship gone horribly wrong and overbearing men and unsatisfied desire. Then he eats some more left overs from Thanksgiving and he tries to…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He frees himself from unpleasant dreams that only leave ominous after images in his brain of a relationship gone horribly wrong and overbearing men and unsatisfied desire. Then he eats some more left overs from Thanksgiving and he tries to start his car with a battery starter but it does not work but it does make the radio work so he sits in what is now his four wheeled radio and listens to the adventures from Lake Woebegone for a while and then he takes the batter starter back inside and he wonders where the Thanksgiving weekend has gone and he reads some more Moll Flanders and he plays some more Words with Friends and he reads about Jeff Bezos’ new plan to deliver packages to people via drone and he does not trust Jeff Bezos because he seems more and more like a villain in a Dr. Who episode laying out an incredibly complicated plot by making it so the world ends up being owned entirely by him so he can then impregnate us all with whatever he wants to impregnate us with. Then he eats some more pie and he feels that this Thanks Giving weekend is getting too long and he is getting bored with it and then he has a nap and then he learns that Paul Walker is dead and he died yesterday in a car crash which is very sad and then he sees that The Republican Party are being made fun of because they celebrated the life or Rosa Parks by saying that she ended racism which is amusing for lots of reasons and then he watches an episode of The Simpsons and then an old episode of Family Guy where Brian is still alive and he wonders if Brian is going to come back to life and it will be a complicated Time travel episode and the shock value of a death in the famil will just be an extended punchline and then he plays Age of Empires III and he directs his tiny little avatars to move around the landscape to cut down trees and mine for silver and hunt deer and trade with native americans and no doubt later on down the road sell them pox ridden blankets and worthless legal documents regarding their land and property. Then he goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He has slept well and long and his alarm has not woken him up and he has nowhere to go and no-one to be so he lies in bed reveling in the sheets and the morning and then he is bored because he wants somewhere to be and someone to be with but…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He has slept well and long and his alarm has not woken him up and he has nowhere to go and no-one to be so he lies in bed reveling in the sheets and the morning and then he is bored because he wants somewhere to be and someone to be with but…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He has slept well and long and his alarm has not woken him up and he has nowhere to go and no-one to be so he lies in bed reveling in the sheets and the morning and then he is bored because he wants somewhere to be and someone to be with but this is not possible right now because of various reasons which will resolve them after the weekend and he prepares a bowl of cereal and he prepares a coffee and then he watches a discussion about Israel by the Council on Foreign Relations and he starts watching a film by the film director Oscar Micheaux starring a young Paul Robeson in his first starring role in a silent movie about a compromised priest and he watches Chris Hedges hectoring rhetoric from 2007 about the rise of Christian Fascism in America and he reads some Moll Flanders and he thinks about masturbating not that this is connected to Moll Flanders and then he washes some dishes not that this is connected to Moll Flanders and he brushes his teeth not that this is connected to Moll Flanders and then he eats some more Thanksgiving Food not that this is connected to Moll Flanders and then he reads some more Moll Flanders and this is connected to Moll Flanders. Then he plays a video game which is morally troubling and then he plays a video game which is not morally troubling. Then he takes a photograph of a pie that he made and then he eats some of the pie. Then he plays words with friends and loses and loses and loses and almost wins but loses again. Then he goes to the bathroom and does the things that one does in a bathroom and then he reads about the trial of the two alleged murderers of the soldier on the streets of London earlier in the year and he is surprised that they are pleading not guilty to the murder of the soldier and then he talks with his lover and that is wonderful and glorious and then he watches the blank wall for a while as he thinks about his life and wonders why it is and then he turns off the light and then he goes to sleep after listening to his landlord snoring through the wall in the other room for a while it is gentle and relaxed and soothing.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He has made no plans for Thanks giving he has no plans for The Indigenous Peoples Sunrise Ceremony but he is not in San Francisco today so he cannot travel by boat to Alcatraz to mourn the genocide of tribes he has no direct connection to. He…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He has made no plans for Thanks giving he has no plans for The Indigenous Peoples Sunrise Ceremony but he is not in San Francisco today so he cannot travel by boat to Alcatraz to mourn the genocide of tribes he has no direct connection to. He…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He has made no plans for Thanks giving he has no plans for The Indigenous Peoples Sunrise Ceremony but he is not in San Francisco today so he cannot travel by boat to Alcatraz to mourn the genocide of tribes he has no direct connection to. He sits in bed and ponders whether to invite himself to various dinners but Boston is now too far away and North Carolina is too far away and his car won’t start again so he walks to the store and he is going to buy a turkey sandwich but then he sees all the families buying food and wine and cheese and he decides to make himself a thanks giving dinner so he buys potatoes and he buys spinach and cream and butternut squash and turkey balls and gravy and stuffing and beetroot and potato salad and wine and cider and he remembers with delight the spare banoffie pie in his fridge that he spent hours making and he remembers with delight the sweet potato fries that are left in his freezer from earlier in the week and he buys some macaroni and cheese and then he walks home and strangers wish him a Happy Thanksgiving with real joy and happiness in their eyes and he responds with similar joy and smiles and he is happy as he enters his house from the cold outside and he drinks cider and he watches the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade and Matt Lauer and Savannah Guthrie are a delight and Al Roker is a delight and the celebrities are more excited to see him than he is to see them because he is an institution – the Nation’s Weatherman which is no small title. Then he enjoys the floats and the balloons and there is a Hello Kitty and a Finn and Jake and a Santa and a Smurf and a Sonic the Hedgehog and with each comes the sales patter massaging everyone for Christmas and there are Zhu Zhu pets and muppets and dancers and singers and it looks cold but they keep on going in a relentless beautifully choreographed marketing pitch for the toys of the season and the gifts of the season and then there was  the Oneida Indian Nation and then there was the  Native Pride Dancers and then there was and the Cherokee Youth Choir and there was no talk of revenge or anger but only of sales and dancing and singing whilst the simmering beneath the surface rage was kept there and acceptance was demanded even if on terms of the kyriarchy. Then he read some stuff about race theory and then he played a video game called Deponia which was entertaining but who had a male character who was an idiot but he was supposed to be lovable but in actual fact just kept the same tropes of unreconstructed buffoonish sexist deceitful maleness that seems to sell a budget Guybrush Threepwood he thinks to himself and then is sad that this is a reference that lots of people will get because he used to enjoy the fact that video games weren’t mainstream because he is a snob. Then he drinks some cider and then he watches a documentary about Jung and then he watches an interview with Jung and the he watches a Ted Talk given by a man who deconstructs the worst of Ted talks and his name is Sam Hyde and the performance is quite brilliant and subversive and will probably do no good at all because nothing ever does and then he tries to learn how to replace his laptop screen and he watches a video and then he feels qualified but it also terrifies him because he knows that the moment he starts he is going to destroy his computer and it is never going to work properly again but he does not have the money to fix it professionaly and as each day passes more and more lines appear on his monitor screen creeping down from the top like vines covering up the screen and one day he will have to guess what he is doing by the sound effects that emanate from the speakers until the speakers break too and then he will fix them but they will not be fixed so he will be typing and clicking at a computer that is to all intents and purposes fully functioning but will have no video or audio clues as to whether he is writing a classic novel, surfing for porn or hacking into the NSA. In all these scenarios the middle option is the most likely. Then he makes his Thanksgiving feast and it is very tasty and he eats food and he drinks wine and he listens to a talk given by Aldous Huxley which he enjoys and he listens to Glenn Greenwald Eviscerating some journalists and then he drinks some more wine and then he worries that the NSA have been following his porn habits for the last few years and hopes that he will not be shamed in public but then he remembers he is not an activist of any kind and not important in any way so they probably do not care about his porn habits so that relieves him so just to be sure he goes to check the porn he has been looking at in the past and it still all seems to be there so he is satisfied that the internet is still okay and then he reads some more and he eats some banoffie pie and has a coffee and he has some more wine and then he goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He is energized. He is fully of energy. He watches the dust motes dance in the beams of light and he is filled with joy at their random dance and then he spend twenty minutes trying to balance the hot and cold taps in the shower in the bath…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He is energized. He is fully of energy. He watches the dust motes dance in the beams of light and he is filled with joy at their random dance and then he spend twenty minutes trying to balance the hot and cold taps in the shower in the bath…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He is energized. He is fully of energy. He watches the dust motes dance in the beams of light and he is filled with joy at their random dance and then he spend twenty minutes trying to balance the hot and cold taps in the shower in the bath and it kills his mood a touch. Then he drives safely and then he eats some breakfast and he does not feel well after he eats that breakfast but not not well enough to vomit everywhere. Then he counts light bulbs and counts gels and cleans things and does productive things and then he makes things and does art and design and his back screams with pain so he cannot sit down he thinks he really must see a professional about that and then he realizes he has to make pies for Thanksgiving so he goes to buy the ingredients and he does not have enough money and the automated teller shames him when he swipes his cards as it says very loudly in a suprised tone of voice oh I’m sorry it seems that your card has been declined as if it feels bad for him but he is judging and the bright red face that beams out of the beard and the hat and the hood shines and draws attention to it and he has to ask for human help and the human kindly helps and removes some items from his cart and this fixes the problem but as he walks home in the rain his back in pain he wonders why the screaming surprise of the automated machine refusing his card why it has to be so loud and why the light has to flash and why he has to be shamed in public and then he makes  a sandwich and then he makes four pies and then he reads and he writes and he changes clothes for pyjamas and then he has a hot chocolate and then he goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He has been ill. He has been sick. He has evacuated everything of himself into and out of and through and over and above and beyond and his bent double staggering round the toilet bowl agony in his beard and dripping from his mouth and from…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He has been ill. He has been sick. He has evacuated everything of himself into and out of and through and over and above and beyond and his bent double staggering round the toilet bowl agony in his beard and dripping from his mouth and from…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He has been ill. He has been sick. He has evacuated everything of himself into and out of and through and over and above and beyond and his bent double staggering round the toilet bowl agony in his beard and dripping from his mouth and from other places wretching stomach spasm illness and bed ridden for days riding the bed for days and no water passes his lips at first and no food can pass his lips at first and then only tiny sips and then only the smallest of nibbles of toast and crackers and the days pass and the agony remains and the sheen of sweat thickens and oils up through the pores as he feels his death and then he is alive once again and cured and pushed through the viral wall that brought him low and he is on his way to work and he skirts a large puddle of vomit on the ground and he staggers back at the volume of a stranger’s sneeze and he feels a storm is coming because a storm is coming because he heard them talk about it on the radio this morning and it has killed people and it is not a metaphor it is a real storm. Then he reads about a Breaking Bad themed wedding and he thinks only in America and then he thinks no that could happen anywhere where Breaking Bad is a popular television show because people are pretty similar when you get right down to it.  Then he remembers the anxiety dream he had about work where nothing was plugged in and he was directed to the wrong studio and he was only told that nothing worked when they were live on air but luckily that was a dream and then he remember his other dream where he was in a vast expanse of blackness being drugged and seduced by a naked white woman with a bobbed crimson pixie cut but then he rejected her advances and she melted into the darkness leaving him alone in the bright light and then later on it is analyzed as a dream about him dealing with his feelings about race theory and his desire to break free of his whiteness and deny it but of course he cannot deny it because he is it but that makes him feel self-loathing but it is something that he has to come to terms with as an individual and as a member of society and then he listens to horrendous monsters sounds and then he does lots of dish washing and glass washing and then he learns that there will be ice rain tomorrow and that irritates him and then he watches Kanye West and Kim Kardashian’s new video and it is not as ridiculous as he has been led to believe and then he watches the James Franco Seth Rogen spoof and it isn’t as funny as he was expecting but actually rather sincere and moving and he feels that whether the intention was to spoof and lampoon the original it hasn’t worked at all and the joke one is actually somewhat profound and moving and he is not sad that either of these videos exist and that they express in a direct way feelings of love and that is not a bad thing and then he is asked by his landlord to talk a little more quietly on the phone because it was keeping him up last night and then he feels a little embarassed because he was talking about graphic sexual things and other things that were not graphic sexual things but very loudly but he didn’t think it was loudly so now everyone in the house who is older and wiser knows all the things he likes to do and that is not necessarily information that he wanted to share but it is done now and he smiles and he brushes his teeth and he goes to sleep glad that these entries are opaque and almost unreadable.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. His landlord is ill. He gives his landlord $750 in cash which makes his landlord a little better and he apologises to his landlord for the check that bounced because it shouldn’t have bounced because he had money in his account so there was…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. His landlord is ill. He gives his landlord $750 in cash which makes his landlord a little better and he apologises to his landlord for the check that bounced because it shouldn’t have bounced because he had money in his account so there was…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. His landlord is ill. He gives his landlord $750 in cash which makes his landlord a little better and he apologises to his landlord for the check that bounced because it shouldn’t have bounced because he had money in his account so there was no reason for it to bounce and then he makes a paper flower which was beautiful and elegant and then he learns that Daniel Day-Lewis’ son has a rap video and he watches it and it is terrible and thick with whining self-deceiving pity and awful posturing cultural appropriation and he can’t watch the whole thing because it makes him feel physically sick and even more disturbed for the hope of humanity but then he puts things in perspective because the crime of a young white man rapping is indicative of bigger problems that will go unsolved if all the time of the day is spent focusing on a young millionaire who has never suffered in any way that merits his concern. Then he watches some W. Kamau Bell and feels happier and then he has a coffee and eats a sandwich and wonders how long the day will last and thinks about writing. Then he watches Hari Kondabolu and he feels happier. Then he reads that some ancient spear tips have been found which might push back the age of modern man to 85000 years ago or it could be that the artefacts were collected poorly and given he was a student of archaeology and did that very thing once it is very likely or there was another branch of humanity that made spear tipped like artefacts or maybe they aren’t spear tips but actually tiddlywinks and the ancient peoples spent all day playing various games of skill to while away the long temperate days. Then he remembers the racists at the African American History section of the Museum of American History who talked abuot blacking up in middle school to dress as Martin Luther King and how it was acceptable to do that then but it probably wouldn’t be acceptable now and that they are illustrating their lack of racism to their friends by being at this museum and walking around this museum and laughing about blacking up as children and unashamed and with justification not finding that this is a problem that runs far deeper than the ignorance of their teachers or their peers or the world they lived in then because black face has never been acceptable to do and walking round a museum dedicated to The Struggle and loudly declaiming that your heart was in the right place and your intentions were good does not let you off the hook as you nervously laugh because you know in your heart that you were party to oppressive racist lampoonery of the worst kind and one might argue that your ignorance as a middle school male was not your fault but your lack of education as a middle aged man is certainly all your fault and you have no excuse for your heinous views and your nervous giggling he thinks to himself. But he does nothing except for to look in irritation at the two people who are oblivious to his rage and then he goes for lunch and then on the National Mall he declares his love and it is romantic and then he goes home and watches Saturday Night Live and falls asleep in happiness.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He is weightless with happiness and even the rain does not dampen him and even the cold does not bother him and the bus driver is singing and the world is clean and hopeful and perfect and then his shoes get wet but it’s still not a disaster.…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He is weightless with happiness and even the rain does not dampen him and even the cold does not bother him and the bus driver is singing and the world is clean and hopeful and perfect and then his shoes get wet but it’s still not a disaster.…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He is weightless with happiness and even the rain does not dampen him and even the cold does not bother him and the bus driver is singing and the world is clean and hopeful and perfect and then his shoes get wet but it’s still not a disaster. Then he eats a sandwich and then he feels great feelings of joy and the hair grows slowly in his ears and in his nostrils and as he walks his legs rub against his trousers and imperceptibly they erode fiber by fiber so that in months to come he will need to buy a new pair of trousers or walk the world wearing trousers with holes in them as he did in his youth without thinking that it was a problem even though looking back he sees that it was a problem and deeper than that a problem that he didn’t think it was a problem. Then he eats some rice and his brother warns him that reheating rice can incubate the botulinim toxin and he is not sure if that is true but his brother is generally a trustworthy source for science but he has already eaten the reheated rice so he just hopes that he has not been infected with botulism and he jokes about mashing the rice into his face and hoping that it works like a botox injection. He imagines Hollywood stars believing this and people who want to be Hollywood stars believing this as they go to special rice boutiques where white gown clad experts mash old wet rice into their glazed mushroom skin faces. Then he goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He has a shower. He drinks some carrot juice. He brushes his teeth. He drinks some more carrot juice. The taste lingers as he walks to the bus. He is the only person except for the driver on the bus. He waits in the cold at the second bus…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He has a shower. He drinks some carrot juice. He brushes his teeth. He drinks some more carrot juice. The taste lingers as he walks to the bus. He is the only person except for the driver on the bus. He waits in the cold at the second bus…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He has a shower. He drinks some carrot juice. He brushes his teeth. He drinks some more carrot juice. The taste lingers as he walks to the bus. He is the only person except for the driver on the bus. He waits in the cold at the second bus stop. Everyone looks tired. He feels tired. He arrives and drinks a coffee and makes some oatmeal and ignores the cat and runs around with a child and talks to another child and watches the school bus leave and goes to the bathroom and walks to the auto shop and balks at the cost of repairs which are the same as the cost of the car which is a lesson to him not to buy a cheap car. Then he gets into work and discovers that he has, by proxy, an Emmy, but he has not really won an Emmy but someone more deserving at his job has won an Emmy but he can pretend that he has won it even though he did nothing to win it. Then he ponders the shut down and wonders if it is a right wing coup and then he wonders about Julian Assange and wonders if he is watching the trailer of The Fifth Estate on loop a thick erection piercing the air in front of him pushing through the open fly of his pyjamas as he wanders around the Ecuadorian Embassy in a cloud of his own ego leaving half eaten bowls of cereal snaffled from the work fridge as disgruntled employees of the building get more and more annoyed with his presence as he scratches and sings his way through the days but then he thinks that this is a terrible imagined view of this Lancelot of Truth and he is no doubt beavering away clean cut and washed on some kind of large tome which will show everyone how to live a better more private life. The government is still shut down and the right wing coup still continues apace. There were ancient volcanoes on Mars which doesn’t seem to be news but is made into news. He makes some egg fried rice which is tasty and unhealthy. He talks to a friend. He worries that his car is a money pit. He plays a video game. He ignores Newt Gingrich. That was all. He goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. Love is complicated and painful and full of apologies and distrust and like a recovering addict he sits shaking in the corner trying to get over the last low quality batch that he injected. He will not do that again he promises himself he…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. Love is complicated and painful and full of apologies and distrust and like a recovering addict he sits shaking in the corner trying to get over the last low quality batch that he injected. He will not do that again he promises himself he…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. Love is complicated and painful and full of apologies and distrust and like a recovering addict he sits shaking in the corner trying to get over the last low quality batch that he injected. He will not do that again he promises himself he will not make that mistake love is not necessary it is not pleasant he has had no good experiences with it it has brought him not happiness no joy only bad poetry and disaster. Egypt collapses in horrible violence and the West looks on as if it has no complicity in any of these things as if everything isn’t interconnected in a fine webbed matrix that goes back to a refused IMF loan earlier in the year because the design of the loan would have reduced even more fuel and food subsidies. There are no goodies and there are no baddies there are just human beings murdering one another and distant patricians looking on with false empathy shaking their heads because in their heads they think they did what they could but those poor Egyptians just weren’t ready for democracy – the democracy of the bovine, the docile, the crushed. Then he drinks some wine and he goes to sleep.

Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He cannot decide whether he should go to work or not but then he realises that there is no one else to do his job so he gets out of his sweating bed and showers and brushes his teeth and walks to the bus and misses the bus and gets on another…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He cannot decide whether he should go to work or not but then he realises that there is no one else to do his job so he gets out of his sweating bed and showers and brushes his teeth and walks to the bus and misses the bus and gets on another…

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Appetite for Distraction – Another Day.


He wakes up. He cannot decide whether he should go to work or not but then he realises that there is no one else to do his job so he gets out of his sweating bed and showers and brushes his teeth and walks to the bus and misses the bus and gets on another bus and gets to work and draws some pictures and eats a lean pocket and a bag of chips and some mint m&ms and then learns that they are an aphrodisiac but they do not give him an erection and then he drinks a milkshake and then the day is almost over and he downloads some video games which make him think deeply about the reality of the world and then he downloads some music which makes him think deeply about the reality of the world and then he has a conversation which makes him think deeply about the reality of the world and then he watches the Rambo cartoon which makes him think deeply about the reality of the world and then he goes to sleep.