Your life is falling apart and that’s the best news you’re going to get today.
All of this has happened before.
Same as this time last week only worse.
You are an amazing cheerleader and an amazing werewolf. Be proud of both.
How many legs do you need? Twelve? Go to the Leg Store you’ll find plenty of legs there. It’s a legs store.
You are bored today.
You will drink a whole glass of water.
You will water a glass hole.
You are going to be awarded the Légion d’honneur.
Kurt Vonnegut wrote his last unpublished novel based on your day. He spent the last two years of his life watching you obsessively. It’s a really bad book.
The SleepCoat League Presents: 