He wakes up. He has a coffee. He has a bagel. He reads about the overuse of oil and how it relates to energy consumption and food. He reads about the genocide in Rwanda in an article by Samantha Power who is the new UN Ambassador for the USA and he wonders if this means that she will be intervening everywhere she can because she definitely makes a case in favor of intervention where and when it is possible in the same way using a similar system to the rules of intervention that goodies in Hollywood movies use when they intervene in a country that they know little about – like when the Three Amigos save the Mexican village or the way that Bruce Willis saves the African village in Tears of the Sun or the way in which James Cameron saves the large blue aliens (secret native Americans) in Ferngully; the last rain forest. Then he eats a lot of cookies and cream ice cream and the he buys a roast chicken and then he eats some of the roast chicken and then he reads the details of the general global terror threat against America and Americans and wonders whether the war on terror is really doing so well if the new threat is coming from anywhere and could be anyone. It doesn’t, to him, seem like the best result from over a decade of war against a tactic, to now warn Americans from travelling anywhere except, it seems to Australia or parts of America, and say that there are both credible and non-specific threats that have been discovered because of the secret NSA spying and that also remember that we arrested all of those paedophiles with the same methods earlier in the week so you had better keep letting us sift through all of your information because David Gregory thinks it’s a good idea and you have nothing to hide do you and you aren’t a terrorist are you or a paedophile so you should have nothing to worry about so we’re going to keep vacuuming up your emails and pictures and conversations and come round to the clinic on Monday so we can inject this chip into your neck. Then he has a nap and then he watches a Rambo cartoon that was made in the eighties which is as racist and violent and sexist as he expected it to be and then he watches some RT which is Infowars lite but entertaining nonetheless and then he reads a book about exxon mobil and then he reads a book about Goldman Sachs and then he weeps a little because he feels powerless but then he has a drink of water and he talks to his nurturing lover and he manages to overlook the horror of the world and he promises himself that he will change it tomorrow. Then he learns that the new Dr. Who is Peter Capaldi and that also Neil Gaiman is being lambasted for saying that it shouldn’t have been a woman but Peter Capaldi isn’t a woman so why is he complaining and then he realises Neil Gaiman isn’t complaining but making a point but it’s a silly point because it could easily have been a woman this time and now the internet hates Neil Gaiman. This has probably never happened to Neil Gaiman before because he is the internet so he is probably a little disoriented and confused and he will probably passivelly and aggressively lash out and maybe his lovely wife Amanda Palmer will write a satirical song in his defence calling all of his detractors cunts that might happen and then some other thing will irritate everyone. Then he watches a video of Donald Trump sniffing Rudy Giuliani’s neck and he feels he has had enough of the day so he goes to sleep.